Ch. 79 - Truths

I love hearing God through people. Sometimes I let those people know, sometimes I keep the knowledge for myself.

I love questions that make me think. Really think. I love questions that - even though they've made me think and think and think, and I believe I've finally come up with an answer - will never have an absolute answer. You can argue about ideas all you want and think that you've come to a resolution at the end of the day, but does it matter? Some questions you will never have the answer to. You can have a good idea, sure, but the only One who truly knows the answer is God. Better start making your list now. It's not like you have eternity to think of all the questions you want to ask, after all.

... Right.

I love hearing truths about myself through other people. It doesn't matter if I already know about them or not, or if they're 'good' truths or not. I still find it interesting to hear what other people see in or think of me, especially because it doesn't happen often.

"You're so stubborn."
Tell me about it.

I love talking about something as if it's a secret - even though it's not.

"Tell me something you don't want to tell me right now."
Now that's vulnerability.
So I told him a few things.
Last night, I wanted to scream - just to scream.
I've felt that before.
I'll feel it again.
So I assure you my promise to you will be kept.
I don't like myself.
Do I love myself? Yes.
Not as much as I'd like to, yet I do.
But I don't like myself.
I am subdued.
I miss being colorful.
Read Shakespeare's As You Like It - Act II, Scene VII, lines 139-140.
That's how I used to feel.

But God loves me as I am. He loves me where I am. So why change?


' "... the Father himself loves you... " '
[John 16:27]