May 31, 2008

Ch. 87 - God is Good

I'm going home for the remainder of the summer.

I'll be attending CCCB next year.

And that's that!


'I love you, O Lord, my strength.'
[Psalm 18:1]

May 30, 2008

Ch. 86 - Weighted Down

I want to transfer.
Again.

To the same school I wanted to transfer to a few months ago, Central Christian College of the Bible (which is in Moberly, Missouri).

I don't know what's wrong with me! Even when I took that... ummm, hiatus... I kept thinking about it. I was so sure that I wanted to stay here. And my parents are going to kill me, I'm pretty sure. But I don't think I'd mind, because then I wouldn't have to feel guilty anymore and there would be no more making billions of decisions (see my 'Side Notes' blog...). Plus I'd get to be with Jesus. Always a good thing.

If I was so sure that I'm supposed to be here, why does this come up again? Why do I feel so torn? I don't usually like to even joke around with saying things like, "Why does God torture me like this?!" but I'm at that point, currently, and I think I can afford to be pessimistic once in a while.

I don't think this is for me, after all. I don't want to work for the government. Neither do I want to teach English or Arabic. Or work in hospitals or other private sector areas. I want to know the Bible inside and out. I want to know everything there is to know about God and His qualities, Jesus, His life, His disciples, His teachings. I want to learn theology, Christian principles and history. I could try to teach myself as much as I could, but I know myself better than that. I need structure. I need discipline. Why not go to school to learn what I want to learn, have that structure and discipline, truly, truly, truly love what I'm doing and get a degree out of it? I want to focus all of my attention on this. It's like I need to or else I'll go crazy.

I need to answer this call.
I kept saying "I'm staying, I'm home."
I kept saying "I'm at peace with my decision."
But was I really?
I think that by saying I was I was trying to get myself to think that I was.
If I don't go now, I may regret not doing so in the future.
So I'm going to say it again.
I need to answer this call.

I want to fully serve God.
I want to share His Word.
I want to share His Love.
I want to help people.
I want to share my faith.
I want to build up His Kingdom.
I want to go on missions.

Biblical Studies and Cross-Cultural Ministry at CCCB.
It's perfect.

I've used this Bible verse before, but I will never hesitate to use it again:


' "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." '
[Jeremiah 29:11-13]

(Context, schmontext.)

May 29, 2008

Ch. 85 - Work It!

Good works are nice.
If you have the right intention, that is.
[You know. Wanting to please God - and only God.]
But they don't get you into heaven.


'But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions - it is by grace you have been saved.'
[Ephesians 2:4-5]

May 28, 2008

Ch. 84 - A Love/Hate Thing

As I was hauling myself back and forth across town yesterday between the driver license division building, social security office and my dorm, I had a lot of time to sit, think and read. And sit some more. While in the social security office I let my Bible fall open and it came to the beginning of Ecclesiastes. I started reading from the beginning. As I began chapter three, titled 'A Time for Everything', I became excited because the first eight verses of this chapter are one of my favorite groups of verses in the Bible.

So I began to read.

'There's a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:'
'... a time to be born and a time to die...'
'... a time to weep and a time to laugh...'
'... a time to search and a time to give up...'

Then I came to the eighth verse.

'... a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.'

A time to hate?

I had never taken this verse into consideration or even cared that it said there is a time to hate.

I decided to look a bit deeper into this, because for some reason it struck me pretty hard and I couldn't stop thinking about it. This is what I found, thanks to the Blue Letter Bible:

Ecclesiastes 3:8 is interconnected with Luke 14:26 -

' "If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters - yes, even his own life - he cannot be my disciple." '

Hm. Picture this. Some angsty tenth grader, whose passion and mission in life is hating the world, is being forced to read the Bible by their mom - who thinks that it will do the kid some good. Amazingly enough, they actually do it. They come to this verse in Luke. A light goes on, a grin slowly spreads across their face and they immediately go find their mom. "Mom, guess what?! Jesus told me to hate my family." Now that their self-allowance of speaking ten words a month has been reached, they go running off to do whatever it is that angsty tenth graders do these days.

The thing is, the kid didn't care about what Jesus was saying. First of all, the topic of discipleship is a big deal. To be a disciple of Christ - to follow in His footsteps - is an honor. And I don't think it's to be taken lightly. Secondly, this verse can't be taken literally. Its true meaning is actually the opposite of what it seems to say. This verse speaks of love.

You should love God so much that love for your family and self seems like hate. Only when your love for God is greater than your love for anyone or anything else can you be a true disciple of Christ.

Love God.
Transform.
Give it up.
Carry your cross.
Follow Jesus.
Be a disciple.


'If anyone acknowledges that Jesus is the Son of God, God lives in him and he in God. And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him.'
[1 John 4:15-16]

......

Ch. Eighty-Three, Part Two:

I like the fact that this post started with explaining my curiosity of what 'a time to hate' means... and ended with the focus not on hate at all, but instead on love. This is fascinating to me, because once I'm interested in something and want to learn about it, most of my time, energy and focus goes into whatever that 'something' is until I either, a) have learned all that I can or b) am satisfied with what I've learned. So this time, when I'm actually interested in hate, it turns a 180 on me and I end up learning about love. As Phil, my youth pastor in Iowa, likes to say, "It's a God thing."

May 27, 2008

Ch. 83 - Faith

"True faith is never found alone; it is accompanied by expectation."
- C.S. Lewis

A few months ago at Cru, we were given pieces of paper with quotes on them. There were five different quotes, and this is the first I'd like to focus on. I'm really glad that I kept these little slips of paper; I had pinned them up on my desk's bulletin board that night after Cru and they remained there even when I was walking away from Christ. When I was moving to the summer dorm I took them down and put them in my memory box. I just put them up on my board yesterday and I keep reading them again and again and again.

"True faith is never found alone; it is accompanied by expectation."

The first thing that comes to my mind when I read or say this is a verse from Hebrews:

'Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.'
[Hebrews 11:1, NASB]

The first time I had truly heard and read this verse was a couple years ago. Our head pastor, Harlan, was giving the sermon and he had the congregation repeat this verse a good ten times throughout his sermon. He believes it to be one of those verses that we should all have memorized. And I agree.

Harlan used the NASB (New American Standard Bible) translation and I'm glad. It has a nice ring to it, you know? So this is the version that I have committed to memory. However, the NIV (New International Version) translation works better with the quote, I think:

'Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.'
[Hebrews 11:1, NIV]

Expectation is found alongside faith. We will set expectations from our God through our faith. We will expect God to do. To give. To love. To speak. To heal. To forgive. But is it all of a shallow faith? To have faith in a God whom we believe will do anything for us - going through the motions, expecting something from Him all the time. We have to expect things from God. If we want to be forgiven, we have to ask for it while thoroughly believing that He will forgive us. Otherwise what's the point of asking?

"Hey God. Umm... I kind of need you to forgive me for what I said yesterday. Yeah. You know what I'm talking about. I mean, you don't have to. And if you can't, that's ok. Like, it's no big deal, you know? But yeah. Sweet. Uhh, 'nJesusnameIprayAmen."

This is not the way to go about it. First of all, if you say that God doesn't have to, then why are you asking in the first place? Secondly, who are you to question whether God can do something? He can do anything! And He's done everything by giving us His Son. Even so, He doesn't expect anything from us but belief and love. Yet He still wants to share in our hopes and our failures and our dreams and our misfortunes and yes, our expectations. We can give it all to Him if we so desire.

If you have anything on your heart right now - whatever it may be - I challenge you to share it with God. Know - expect - that He is listening and that He cares.


'The desire of the righteous ends only in good, but the hope of the wicked only in wrath.'
[Proverb 11:23]

......

Ch. Eighty-Two, Part Two:

After I finished writing this post, I went to www.christnotes.com because all of a sudden it just came into my head; I hadn't visited this site for about two and a half months. I checked the Daily Bible Verse, and guess what it was?

Hebrews 11:1,3

I just laughed and laughed and laughed when I saw that.

[Verse 3 says: 'By faith we understand that the universe was formed at God's command, so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible.']

May 26, 2008

Ch. 82 - Forever

Our God is strong.

His Word is strong.

Faithful.
Enduring.
Wise.

Don't forget that.
Ever.


'The grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of our God stands forever.'
[Isaiah 40:8]

May 25, 2008

Ch. 81 - A Simple Reminder

JESUS
JESUS
JESUS
JESUS
JESUS
JESUS
JESUS
JESUS

He is everything.
I am nothing without Him.


'Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. If you really knew me, you would know my Father as well. From now on, you do know him and have seen him." '
[John 14:6-7]