All I need right now is to hear His voice. All I want right now, really. And what I need, then, is to listen and act accordingly to what I hear. I desire to desire Him... does that make sense? I want to be able to say that I am truly running after God because I yearn for Him. I want a mere taste... and then, from that, want nothing else. Nothing less.
Sometimes I just feel so mixed up inside. Angry? Confused? Sad? Anxious? Restless? I just... don't know... I want to be able to sort everything out. I feel as if I needed a jump start in order to do so.
[Trapped.]
I need... peace.
... joy.
... a calm.
I don't know how else to describe it... but I feel that fits pretty well.
Praise God, always.
Psalm 69:9
Psalm 73:25-26
Psalm 78:8
July 29, 2010
July 23, 2010
Ch. 717 - Thoughts, Pt. One
The following five posts came from my journal on the dates given and were all written while in the Wind and Fire prayer room here in Iowa. I love this place. But I love His presence in this place even more. The ministry of W&F is so anointed and I have so greatly enjoyed learning about what they do from one of the staff members, "Mama" Jane. She has been such an encouragement and a blessing to me over the summer.
......
I am His.
He is mine.
His beauty radiates from the throne.
Confession brings His presence.
He wants to give us mercy.
And peace.
And joy.
And healing.
Sometimes what we want to do so greatly is difficult to do.
FOCUS.
Cover me with the blood of the Lamb, Lord God.
Open my eyes.
Ears.
Spirit.
Heart.
Mind.
... only to receive things of You.
Saving grace has been extended to me.
I'd be a fool not to accept it day after day.
What more can I give?
I give You my praise, all my days... all my days.
Rest.
Reconnect.
2 Corinthians 3:17-18
......
I am His.
He is mine.
His beauty radiates from the throne.
Confession brings His presence.
He wants to give us mercy.
And peace.
And joy.
And healing.
Sometimes what we want to do so greatly is difficult to do.
FOCUS.
Cover me with the blood of the Lamb, Lord God.
Open my eyes.
Ears.
Spirit.
Heart.
Mind.
... only to receive things of You.
Saving grace has been extended to me.
I'd be a fool not to accept it day after day.
What more can I give?
I give You my praise, all my days... all my days.
Rest.
Reconnect.
2 Corinthians 3:17-18
July 18, 2010
Ch. 716 - In His Presence
"In Your presence, all fear is gone... in Your presence.
In Your presence, is where I belong... in Your presence."
We sang this in church this morning. It's part of a song, but it's the only part we sang. ... And I am so glad.
I was overwhelmed with His presence.
I didn't know what to do.
I didn't know what to say.
I didn't know what to think.
So I just stood there.
Eyes closed.
Arms out.
Soaking.
Gazing upon His throne, radiant light shining upon my face.
Peace.
A silent joy.
Drifting thoughts about the Lamb.
His death.
His resurrection.
Victory.
His Father.
Heaven.
Heaven... our true home.
"Until He returns... or calls me home..."
Home.
Sometimes I feel like even though I am here in Iowa, with my family, I am not home. Sometimes I feel like I don't have a home. That I don't belong anywhere.
Heaven.
'That' is heavenly.
'This' is like heaven on earth.
"Is this heaven?"
... "No, it's Iowa."
I think, however, that I have finally found heaven on earth.
I am at home in His presence.
And that's all that matters.
......
Spirit-filled.
Ears covered.
Ears opened.
Lies.
Still dirty.
But refreshed.
It's a start.
......
Click here to revisit Chapter 161.
In Your presence, is where I belong... in Your presence."
We sang this in church this morning. It's part of a song, but it's the only part we sang. ... And I am so glad.
I was overwhelmed with His presence.
I didn't know what to do.
I didn't know what to say.
I didn't know what to think.
So I just stood there.
Eyes closed.
Arms out.
Soaking.
Gazing upon His throne, radiant light shining upon my face.
Peace.
A silent joy.
Drifting thoughts about the Lamb.
His death.
His resurrection.
Victory.
His Father.
Heaven.
Heaven... our true home.
"Until He returns... or calls me home..."
Home.
Sometimes I feel like even though I am here in Iowa, with my family, I am not home. Sometimes I feel like I don't have a home. That I don't belong anywhere.
Heaven.
'That' is heavenly.
'This' is like heaven on earth.
"Is this heaven?"
... "No, it's Iowa."
I think, however, that I have finally found heaven on earth.
I am at home in His presence.
And that's all that matters.
......
Spirit-filled.
Ears covered.
Ears opened.
Lies.
Still dirty.
But refreshed.
It's a start.
......
Click here to revisit Chapter 161.
July 15, 2010
Ch. 715 - Perfect
The perfect Christian...
- is real.
- uses witty comments about the Church for their Facebook status...
... or writes "Christian" blog posts... better yet, how about both?
- thinks outside the box - and doesn't put God in one.
- is missions-minded.
- memorizes hundreds of Bible verses.
- realizes what their spiritual gifts are and utilizes them.
- prays all the time...
... and when they do, they close their eyes, bow their heads, and put on a nice, little smile.
- is humble.
- may or may not die for Christ.
- stands up for their beliefs.
- encompasses all the fruits of the Spirit...
... or, at the very least, actually knows what they are.
- points out the sins of others "in Christian love".
- knows they are saved.
- only listens to Christian music.
- is involved with [a] ministry.
- has attended, attends, or will attend a Bible college.
- shines the light of Jesus Christ.
- goes to church every Sunday...
... and Bible study. And small group. Plus the small group that they lead. And church choir. And women's group/men's group. And is on at least two church committees.
- constantly strives to be more like Christ.
- confesses their sins to others.
- reads their Bible.
- loves God.
- loves their neighbors as him or herself.
- does not sin. Oh wait...
... that's not possible.
Well.
I guess nobody's a perfect Christian.
Dang.
I suppose I should apologize for disappointing the multitude that thinks they are.
Sorry. But you're not.
So get off your high horse.
Perhaps you should get down on your knees.
......
Click here to revisit Chapter 157.
- is real.
- uses witty comments about the Church for their Facebook status...
... or writes "Christian" blog posts... better yet, how about both?
- thinks outside the box - and doesn't put God in one.
- is missions-minded.
- memorizes hundreds of Bible verses.
- realizes what their spiritual gifts are and utilizes them.
- prays all the time...
... and when they do, they close their eyes, bow their heads, and put on a nice, little smile.
- is humble.
- may or may not die for Christ.
- stands up for their beliefs.
- encompasses all the fruits of the Spirit...
... or, at the very least, actually knows what they are.
- points out the sins of others "in Christian love".
- knows they are saved.
- only listens to Christian music.
- is involved with [a] ministry.
- has attended, attends, or will attend a Bible college.
- shines the light of Jesus Christ.
- goes to church every Sunday...
... and Bible study. And small group. Plus the small group that they lead. And church choir. And women's group/men's group. And is on at least two church committees.
- constantly strives to be more like Christ.
- confesses their sins to others.
- reads their Bible.
- loves God.
- loves their neighbors as him or herself.
- does not sin. Oh wait...
... that's not possible.
Well.
I guess nobody's a perfect Christian.
Dang.
I suppose I should apologize for disappointing the multitude that thinks they are.
Sorry. But you're not.
So get off your high horse.
Perhaps you should get down on your knees.
......
Click here to revisit Chapter 157.
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