Ch. 710 - Summer Excitement

One week... I decided not to play catch-up. It's all good.

My second - and second to last - year at Central Christian College of the Bible came to a close this past Wednesday, as I rounded out my last day with two finals. They were the toughest of my five, and I got a high 'A' on each. Fabulous. But I can really only attribute my successes to God, for He blessed me with the abilities and skills necessary to do well. I simply put them to use. If you try to pound a nail into a piece of wood without a hammer, it's not exactly going to work. Using your hand won't do anything. And using something other than a hammer may work, but it's really just not the same. While it's nice to see or hear acknowledgment for doing well on something, I can't pretend like I truly deserve anything. Glory to God, in all things great and small.

Summer has begun, and I don't know how to feel about it...

Two jobs.
Two classes.
Two churches [more on this later...].

I plan on spending a lot of time with my brother, Wes - he just finished his first year of college and I am really proud of him. Anyway, we have dubbed the next few months S²'10:

SIBLING SUMMER 2010!

So great.
We're stoked.
We've started making a list of things we plan on doing, and without a doubt more "to-do" items will be added to it within the next week or two.

I think what I'm most excited about this summer, though, is the fact that I plan on falling more and more in love with Christ. I ended the school year on a positive note in regards to my relationship with Him, but I'm... fine. Just... fine.

I want to be better than fine.
And I want to be stepping forward, not standing still.

Lately I've been getting myself down... and I let myself be kept there by the prince of this world - and I am [obviously] pretty okay with that. It's easy... I mean, it's not necessarily good for those around me, but for me? It's comfortable. I can make it work. Of course, I tend to mess things up pretty terribly when I get into this state. Mistakes. Regrets. But sometimes I feel like I really just don't like myself. So I wonder how anyone else could ever like me, let alone love me. Of course, I know my flaws. I tend to see myself in a negative light. I am, truly, an animal. And so I figure that I deserve to be where I am. I deserve to allow myself to think of ME the way I do. But as someone very dear to my heart told me today, "We're all going to have things we are striving to improve in ourselves. We can't dwell in the negative. That's the adversary trying to keep us down. We have to remember our worth in Christ."

Beautiful.

As is Christ.
As am I.

Valuation.
That is my focus for the summer.
For myself.
For others.
For God.


'Let the morning bring me word of your
unfailing love,
for I have put my trust in you.
Show me the way I should go,
for to you I lift up my soul.
Teach me to do your will,
for you are my God;
may your good Spirit
lead me on level ground.'
[Psalm 143:8-10]

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Ch. 710, Part Two:

One definition of "valuation" in the Merriam-Webster dictionary is the following: 'judgment or appreciation of worth or character'.

Now you know.

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Click here to revisit Chapter 130.