Ch. 257 - Opening Up

I have no clue what I'm going to do in the future.
I have no clue where I'm going to be.
I have no clue who I'm going to be working with.
I have no clue who I'm going to start a family with.

I've said it before, I'll say it again: I do not like not having a set-in-stone plan. I do not like not knowing what's going to happen. Don't get me wrong, spontaneity is fine. And surprises are fantastic. But when it really comes down to it, I like having a good bit of knowledge as to what will be going down, and when, and where, and with whom.

I'm still really struggling with simply knowing that God will take care of it all. I know He'll set the ball in motion, but I have to acknowledge what He's doing and take that first step towards it. And that's tough. I think I'd be having a much easier time with everything if I weren't so darn indecisive... not gonna lie.

I'm basically taking one step forward, then two steps back.
And it's all because I'm not putting enough trust in God.
I'm not okay with that.


' "Lord, if it's you," Peter replied, "tell me to come to you on the water." "Come," he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, "Lord, save me!" Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. "You of little faith," he said, "why did you doubt?" And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. Then those who were in the boat worshiped him, saying, "Truly you are the Son of God." '
[Matthew 14:28-33]