Ch. 561 - Just Sayin'...

I am a daughter of God.


'Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God - children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband's will, but born of God.'
[John 1:12-13]

Ch. 560 - The Heartbreaker

I've prayed for him and I've cursed him.
I've loved him and I've hated him.
I've laughed because of him and I've cried because of him.
I've been attached to him and I've ignored him.
I died because of him, and I am living because of him.

I don't know why, but God has placed him in my life for a reason and I will never stop loving him - as a brother in Christ, and as a friend. Life is tough for him. Always has been and, most likely, always will be. This is due to a lot of circumstances that were out of his control, but it has also been due to a lot of choices that he has made over the past few years. Realizations of consequences of said choices are just now hitting him, I think. He is hurting. It's in his voice. And while I'm sure he's becoming a stronger person through it all, things are not how they should be. The biggest thing is that he's not living a life for Christ anymore. He's not God-focused. He said he prays to God in thanksgiving every day, but his relationship with Him isn't what it used to be.

He made Christ come alive for me.
I wished my faith could be like his.
True.
Honest.
Open.
Real.
A way of life.

And now he's saying he wishes his faith could be like mine.

... Wow.

It pains me to see how he's taken so many steps backwards in regards to his walk with God. I pray and pray and pray and PRAY and PRAY and PRAY and PRAY and PRAY and PRAY... but for the most part I see or hear of nothing that makes me think it makes a difference. It's incredibly discouraging at times... that is, until I receive something such as a random text from him asking how I'm doing. Because that alone is an answer to a facet of my prayers. A question asked, a prayer request here and there, an update through a phone conversation... all these may seem prosaic and ordinary to most people, but to me they are, indeed, answers to my prayers and thus are cherished gifts that I hold dear to my heart.

But I hate the fact that all I can do is pray and ask God to speak to him through me when we do get the opportunity to talk. I just feel like I should and could be doing so much more for him - but I unfortunately know that cannot be the case.

I can't change him.
I can't soften his heart.
I can't make him do anything.

But my Lord God can do these things.

And I need to remember that.

Just because there is seemingly no evidence of progress doesn't mean that it won't happen. I need to trust God and remind myself that He works all things out for good. There is a purpose for everything. And my God is an awfully amazing God.
Patience.
Patience.
Patience.

Pray in faith.
Expect great things.


'Relent, O Lord! How long will it be? Have compassion on your servants. Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days.'
[Psalm 90:13-14]

Ch. 559 - Dizzy

'So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don't fall!'
[1 Corinthians 10:12]

Ch. 558 - A Renewed Excitement

Laodicea.
[NTP homework.]

A renewed excitement for school.
It's about time...

I am so blessed to be here.
It's a privilege, really.
An honor.

I am taking it for granted and wasting time.
Who am I to do such a thing?

God may be the greatest teacher, but He has allowed it so that certain members of the body of Christ are also teachers... this is a great thing.

More later...

Ch. 557 - Here and Now

'If you gotta start somewhere, why not here?
If you gotta start sometime, why not now?
...
Through the fog there is hope in the distance;
from cathedrals to third world missions,
love will fall to the earth like a crashing wave.'
[tobyMac's City On Our Knees]

I've fallen in love with this song.
It speaks truth and it is convicting.
(Check it out if you've yet to hear it!)

I'm not ready.
I'm willing...
But I'm not ready.

I'm finally realizing that's alright.
There's no rush. People are dying, and going to hell.
But I can't save them all.
I can't save a single one.
God does that.
If He's chosen them, it will happen -
whether God uses me or not, it will happen.

It's not about me.

He will use me wherever and whenever He wants.
I need to develop the abilities and gifts He has given me.
... Although I suppose it'd be a good thing to first identify those abilities and gifts before I attempt to develop them... Ha.

There's so much to do right here, right now.
It's easy to want to overlook that.
No more.


'Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.'
[Galatians 6:9]

Ch. 556 - Seeking Together

'After this, the Moabites and Ammonites with some of the Meunites came to make war on Jehoshaphat. ... Alarmed, Jehoshaphat resolved to inquire of the LORD, and he proclaimed a fast for all Judah. The people of Judah came together to seek help from the Lord; indeed, they came from every town in Judah to seek him.'
[2 Chronicles 20:1,3-4]

Ch. 555 - The Recovery

Over the past few weeks, I feel as if I've become a different person. I can't decide whether I like it or not. Because while I do believe I've changed for the better, I can't completely tell if it's because I've turned to God and finally let Him show me who He truly created me to be, or if I'm simply putting on a mask of someone whom I'd like to be. Now, it is of my own desire, my own choice to take each day with a positive attitude and a cheerful disposition. For example, I begin most days by praying to God for exactly that - and I think it does help me get started on the right foot. And I seem to notice a difference when I don't pray first thing or include that desire in my prayers.

So, in summary:
I pray, I'm good to go.
I've been happier.
I attempt to draw closer to God.

However...

I'm not completely focusing on God throughout my days. And while I do believe that He is the source of my joy, I've come to realize that it is a joy shared with other people. By that I mean my joy is not fully found in God. And thus I find myself turning to my friends as much as, if not more than God.

I don't like that.

Granted, I don't believe it's necessarily a bad thing to receive joy in spending time with others or learning about people. "Fellowship." Right...

But here's the thing:
I said I 'attempt' to draw closer to God.
I feel like I've lost the fire I had a few weeks ago.
I know what's changed. And that's good.
"The first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem."
I need to turn around.
Walk back a few steps.
Find a balance.
It will make things so much better, I think.

I am continually amazed by the fact that our God is consistent.
Man is incredibly inconsistent. Unstable.
Ruled by fear.
Ruled by desires.
Fear God.
Turn away.


'My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.'
[Psalm 73:26]

Ch. 554 - More

'Your love has given me great joy and encouragement, because you, brother, have refreshed the hearts of the saints.
[Philemon 1:7]'

Ch. 553 - Justified by Grace

'But now a righteousness from God, apart from law, has been made known, to which the Law and the Prophets testify. This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.'
[Romans 3:21-24]

Ch. 552 - Life through Death

'The next day John saw Jesus coming toward him and said, "Look, the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world!" '
[John 1:29]

Sacrifice may be the taking away of life.

Jesus the Christ was a sacrifice.

So in and through Him, sacrifice has given life to many.

What a blessing.


'... and from Jesus Christ, who is the faithful witness, the firstborn from the dead, and the ruler of the kings of the earth. To him who loves us and has freed us from our sins by his blood...'
[Revelation 1:5]

Ch. 551 - A Lamp

'Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.'
[Psalm 119:105]

Ch. 550 - By His Spirit

'He said to me, "This is the word of the Lord to Zerubbabel: 'Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,' says the Lord Almighty." '
[Zechariah 4:6]

Ch. 549 - A Love Story

God is in the stars.
God is in the timber.

Can you see Him?

He is loving.
He is comforting.

Can you feel Him?

God roars.
God whispers.

Can you hear Him?

Be still and know.

No running.
No turning.

He surrounds us.

Are you glad?


'Sing joyfully to the Lord, you righteous;
it is fitting for the upright to praise
him.
Praise the Lord with the harp;
make music to him on the ten-
stringed lyre.
Sing to him a new song;
play skilfully, and shout for joy.

For the word of the Lord is right and
true;
he is faithful in all he does.
The Lord loves righteousness and
justice;
the earth is full of his unfailing love.'
[Psalm 33:1-5]

Ch. 548 - First and Foremost

In John 17:26 Jesus prays, ' "I have made you known to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and that I myself may be in them." '

I have come to believe and trust that it is God's desire to continually be in fellowship and communion with us.

So why don't we allow time in our day-to-day lives to let this happen?
Are we afraid of growing too close to God?

"Jesus freaks."

What holds us back?
Do we truly and wholeheartedly desire the same thing(s) as God?

The chorus of the song Where We Belong says,
'We run to Your throne, where we belong.
Every heart will sing that Jesus is Lord.
Casting all else aside, for the joy of our Christ.
Let Your glory fall, our hearts are filled with Your fire.'

This is what I desire so greatly - and not merely for myself, but for others, as well. I think when we finally realize how greatly a relationship with God should take precedence in our lives, and attempt to stand before Him with a pure heart, it will happen.

God's will, not mine.

Ch. 547 - "If"

' "If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land." '
[2 Chronicles 7:14]

Ch. 546 - Rest and Salvation

'My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him.'
[Psalm 62:1]

Ch. 545 - The Night Before

A devotional for the day that I received in my email. It's beautifully gripping.

The Healing Choices Jesus Made for You

'Read this as a prayer:

On the night before you died, you prayed for me, that I would be as close as a heartbeat to the Father (John 17:22).

On the night before you died, you called me friend, no longer a servant, because you'd taught me everything the Father taught you (John 15:15). On the night before you died, you came to me with bloody sweat dripping down your face and arms because you'd stared straight into the future with eyes wide open at the truth, while I hid behind the covers of my deep, denial sleep.

On the night before you died, you shook me and seemed to ask, "Can't you watch with me? Come beside me, friend, and wait the time with me" (Matthew 26:40, author paraphrase).

On the night before you died, I saw a man intimate with sorrow, but also the Word become man, "the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth" (John 1:14 NIV).

On the night before you died, you understood my struggle, but never demanded that I understand yours. You whispered, "I know how it is, brother, the spirit is willing, but the body is weak" (based on Matthew 26:41 NIV).

On the night before you died, I saw you, friend, so full of sorrow, yet, on that night you proved to be the better friend, still the teacher, still the brother, still thinking of me above all your own needs, the Lamb of God on mission to redeem faulty friends, like me.'

Ch. 544 - Something Greater

'The king said, "This one says, 'My son is alive and your son is dead,' while that one says, 'No! Your son is dead and mine is alive.' " Then the king said, "Bring me a sword." So they brought a sword for the king. He then gave an order: "Cut the living child in two and give half to one and half to the other." The woman whose son was alive was filled with compassion for her son and said to the king, "Please, my lord, give her the living baby! Don't kill him!" But the other said, "Neither I nor you shall have him. Cut him in two!" Then the king gave his ruling: "Give the living baby to the first woman. Do not kill him; she is his mother." '
[1 Kings 3:23-27]

Sacrificial love breaks the system.

Ch. 543 - Drinking the Cup

We need to be willing to accept - and even embrace - everything God hands to us... both the good and that which we deem to be "bad".

It's easy to dwell and focus on the negative, rather than the positive.
I know I've said that before, but it seems that it's becoming all the more apparent how important it is to seek out those positive aspects in life.

Turn to the Light.
Turn to what is good.

God gives us hardships for a reason.
I don't think we should be asking ourselves why He has done so when they appear. Rather, we should ask, "How can I turn this around so that glory is given to God?"


'... "Shall I not drink the cup the Father has given me?" '
[John 18:11]

Ch. 542 - Jumpstart

I've come to a fork in the road.

There are three options.

I can stand still, looking back and forth between the two paths.
Indecisive? Or unconcerned?
I can meander down one path, which loops back around to where I am.
It is never-ending, yet also never-changing.
Or I can run down the other path, which zigs and zags and twists and turns. Uncertainty is an absolute, but so is the excitement of a new adventure.

Lord God, counsel and guide me.


'The heavens are yours, and yours also
the earth;
you founded the world and all that is
in it.'
[Psalm 89:11]

Ch. 541 - Victory in Christ

'The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.'
[1 Corinthians 15:56-58]

Ch. 540 - Communion

'Therefore, whoever eats the bread or drinks the cup of the Lord in an unworthy manner will be guilty of sinning against the body and blood of the Lord. A man ought to examine himself before he eats of the bread and drinks of the cup. For anyone who eats and drinks without recognizing the body of the Lord eats and drinks judgment on himself.'
[1 Corinthians 11:27-29]

Ch. 539 - Showing Your Heart

I feel that I never give my best to anyone.
Including God.

That is a difficult realization. It pains me to admit it. Yet I can only imagine the hurt that God feels, because He created me and knows what I am capable of. And while He knows me even better than I do, I certainly know that I could be giving so much more to not only God, but people as well.

I was talking to a friend tonight and mentioned that even though it may seem a bit prideful, I believe I have a big heart. I added that however, I tend to pick and choose the people I want to share it with. And that's not fair. It's easy to let most people only have a glimpse, and then let a select few see it wholly. I believe I have the right to choose whom I want to give my heart to. But God created us to be the body of Christ. I should thus allow people to know my heart. I think by knowing fellow believer's hearts, it's beneficial to one another in figuring out how we can work together and use our God-given gifts and abilities to further His Kingdom.

But how often do we do that? A friend once told me that we can see people's hearts through their words and actions. And while I agree, I think that we have to be careful in our perceptions... because unfortunately, we are a deceitful people. We don't always mean to deceive, at least not to hurt people, but it happens. A lot of times it's for protection of self. And sometimes, I think we honestly don't know that we're deceiving, or tricking others, because it has become second nature to us. The mind is powerful. I mean, if you tell a lie enough times, you start to believe it's not a lie.

... So even when we think we're letting people know us, letting people know our hearts, it's completely untrue.

I'm not trying to preach to the choir in these posts.
I use "we" and "us" a lot of the time, which means I simply include myself with those whom I am talking to, but my thoughts are usually in first-person. Going off of what I said a couple days ago, I am often talking to myself when I write.
I am inflicted with sin.
I am not blameless.
I am imperfect.
I tend to see and point out my weaknesses and inabilities before I think about my strengths and abilities. So it's easy to want to put up those walls, so that other people don't know about me. And then, when I do reflect and try to focus on those strengths and abilities, it's difficult to let those walls down and let people in.

Man.
Everything's a ridiculous cycle with me.
For example:
I tend to believe that I don't like myself.
So I put up walls, hoping people won't come to know me.
Then I become sad that I'm not close with people.
So I put up façades, thinking people can't tell anything's wrong.
Then I become upset because nobody knows what's going on with me.
So I put on masks, trying to fool people into thinking everything's fine.
Then I realize I'm not being me, and again believe that I don't like myself.

But then I start thinking, 'Well... do I even truly know who I am?'
Do I really know the young woman God created me to be?
Who is that?
What should my heart truly look like?
What should my life look like?

Part of the chorus of the song Faithful Father by Sarah Kelly says:
'Faithful Father I surrender all to You.
All my love and my devotion, all to You.'

Easy to memorize and sing.
Difficult to truly mean and apply.

Do we - no - do I truly surrender all to my God? Do I give Him all my love and devotion?

......

This week we were challenged to live each day with the intent of standing before God with a pure heart. I love that. It's a beautiful challenge. But how can I attempt to do so if I'm not even giving my best to God right now? And yes, He knows my heart and can see it for Himself... but how can I attempt to stand before Him with a pure heart if I'm not even willing to "show" Him my heart in the first place? Having a big heart, potential, and room to grow won't do anything for me if I'm not willing to share it with other people and my Lord God.


'Who may ascend the hill of the Lord? Who may stand in his holy place? He who has clean hands and a pure heart, who does not lift up his soul to an idol or swear by what is false.'
[Psalm 24:3-4]

Ch. 538 - Fix Your Thoughts

'Therefore, holy brothers, who share in the heavenly calling, fix your thoughts on Jesus, the apostle and high priest whom we confess.'
[Hebrews 3:1]

Holy.
Heavenly calling.

Do we live as if these things are true?

Ch. 537 - Uncertainty

'How beautiful are the feet.'
'Go, make disciples.'
'Send me.'

It's Missions Emphasis Week at Central Christian College of the Bible.

So a lot is going on.
And it's really great.

God is working on people's hearts, etc.
His Spirit is moving.
Hallelujah - let it be so, again and again.

Prayers are being answered.
Including some of my own.

But...

[There's always a but, isn't there?]

I'm worried.

Are people serious?
How greatly are they being moved?
Where are their hearts in all this?
Do they truly desire to stand before God with a pure heart?
Will they even strive to do so?

......

I'm talking to myself.
I need faith.


'Bring joy to your servant,
for to you, O Lord,
I lift up my soul.

You are forgiving and good, O Lord,
abounding in love to all who call to you.
[Psalm 86:4-5]

Ch. 536 - Conviction

If I don't do anything about "it" right now, how much more likely am I to do anything in the future?


' "And the gospel must first be preached to all nations." '
[Mark 13:10]

Ch. 535 - A Pet Peeve

I can't stand it when people don't make requests or say prayers in Jesus' name.

' "And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Son may bring glory to the Father. You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it." '
[John 14:13-14]

Maybe I don't fully understand these verses... but it seems to me that Jesus is saying we need to do what I mentioned above in His name... ? Yes, Jesus came to die for us. We can have eternal life because of the grace of God. But this life offered to us was not the only gift given to us by God; Jesus Himself was Life, a gift! He was an example. The perfect example. He was called Teacher. Teachers are examples for their students. Students are to obey their teachers. Now in His dying, Jesus became a Mediator for men to His Father. We can talk to God and ask things of Him and have a true relationship with Him, praise be!

Jesus did so much for us. We shouldn't take anything given us for granted. So heed His words! If He says to do something, do it! Don't ignore it and think that you can get away with not fully following part of His teaching because you start with "Dear God" and at least end with an "Aaamen!"

Ch. 534 - Shame, Disgrace - Replaced

'Instead of their shame my people will receive a double portion, and instead of disgrace they will rejoice in their inheritance; and so they will inherit a double portion in their land, and everlasting joy will be theirs.'
[Isaiah 61:7]

Ch. 533 - He Pardons and Delights

'Who is a God like you, who pardons sin and forgives the transgression of the remnant of his inheritance? You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy.'
[Micah 7:18]

What if we delighted in showing mercy?

The world be a different place, I think.

Ch. 532 - Shouts of... ?

To the loud and obnoxious group of girls sitting right outside my door, I dedicate this haiku:

I like sleep a lot.
Obviously you do not.
Your death I will plot.

A bit harsh, I know.

But there's a reason why I requested a single and was thus moved to Foundation... I can't catch a break, I guess. With roommates or without, I have come to the conclusion that I simply am not "supposed" to have a good night of uninterrupted sleep.

Booooo.

It just makes me think about how greatly I can't wait to be Home. After the fact that I'll get to be in full and complete fellowship with my Lord God, I appreciate the [assumed] fact that I won't need to sleep. The exclamations and praise that will be ringing throughout the heaven and throne room of God will be music to many ears, including my own... unlike the shouting and laughter that is ringing throughout the hallway and seeping like poisonous gas into my room.

Don't get me wrong. I have nothing against [happy] shouting and laughter. In fact, I encourage it. But not after quiet hours. Come on, ladies. It'd be one thing if you were worshiping God by singing songs or praying together, but you're not. That would be music to my ears... I would even join you. And I am an absolute advocate of fellowship. But really? I mean, really? Fellowship with a sense of common courtesy is preferred between the hours of midnight and two:thirty in the morning.

If only I weren't so darn non-confrontational.
... Next time.
And if that doesn't work, I'll take it to the next level.

It just goes to show that God is continuing to teach me patience, even though I have so much more than I used to. Beautiful. There is good in all situations.


'This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.'
[Psalm 118:24]

This is the day, indeed... and we actually should be rejoicing at all times - no matter the hour or situation.
Amen?
Amen.
Praise God!

Ch. 531 - Forgiving Grievances

'Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as you the Lord forgave you.'
[Colossians 3:13]

Easier said than done?
Absolutely.

Does that mean that you shouldn't strive to do so?
Absolutely not.

Ch. 530 - Watching Out

'Who is the liar? It is the man who denies that Jesus is the Christ. Such a man is the antichrist - he denies the Father and the Son.'
[1 John 2:22]

Ch. 529 - Oh no.

It's not even November.
And I feel like I'm on the verge of drowning.
I have no idea why.

But I still feel close to God.

Weird?
... You're telling me.

I don't know what to do.
"Turn to God."
"Pray."

Sigh.
Typical.

Skeptical.
Not good.


'The Lord is the strength of his people, a fortress of salvation for his anointed one. Save your people and bless your inheritance; be their shepherd and carry them forever.'
[Psalm 28:8-9]

Ch. 528 - A Proud Heart

'Before his downfall a man's heart is proud, but humility comes before honor.'
[Proverb 18:12]

Here we go.

Ch. 527 - Ugly/Beautiful Servants

What is wrong with us?

Why do we get so caught up in ourselves?
Why do we care about meaningless matters?
Why do we let ourselves become distracted by worldly things?

We don't keep our promises.
We don't follow through.
We don't care.
Or love.
Or obey.
Or seek.

And I hate it.

We are wretched creatures.
Beautiful children.

We are ugly sinners.
Radiant treasures.

Chosen servants.

We say we are defined by Christ.
We say we live our lives for Him.

How often are others able to discern these beliefs in looking at our lives?

In his new book, Forgotten God, Francis Chan writes, "My brothers and sisters who have received the Holy Spirit, we often lack love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, etc., even while many of our unbelieving friends exhibit these traits - brothers and sisters, these things ought not to be so!"

'Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring?'
[James 3:11]

You may be able to fool the people of this earth, but you can't fool God.
And His view of you matters so much more.
So stop, already.
Take off the mask you have on.
Destroy it, along with all the others.
Your heart is not more beautiful when you wear one of them.
Love God.
Serve God.
Be real.


' "So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, 'We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.' " '
[Luke 17:10]

Ch. 526 - Indispensable

Ear.
Shoulder.

Disregarded.
Important.


'The eye cannot say to the hand, "I don't need you!" And the head cannot say to the feet, "I don't need you!" On the contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable...'
[1 Corinthians 12:21-22]

Ch. 525 - Strength in Brokenness

I'm on such a roller coaster right now. Things are actually going quite well for me at this point in time, for the most part. But when something gets me down, I fall to the ground pretty hard. It can be intense. The thing is, I've recently started praying for brokenness. And God is responding... quickly, and with what seems like no mercy! But I'm glad, because it's something I really need and want - it's simply been difficult to adjust to.

I'm constantly being reminded of how many ways God works and responds. God is God. He is Greater than we can imagine. And yet while I attempt to listen to His voice and I ask for His guidance, I still make a lot of choices on my own accord. For example, even though I had started to look into transferring to Bible college before anything of consequence occurred, my final decision to come to Central was based on guilt. Awful, but true. And it was prayed about initially, but it came down to a quick response. Fortunately for me, God has worked things out in my favor and I believe that regardless of reason for coming to Central, it's where God wants me.

It's interesting, though, to see how my expectations were not met this past year. I've thought about it often and reflected on the months and to this day I am completely unsure about what I did or did not do that affected me in such a way that my relationship with God greatly suffered. Before school ended, I was nowhere near where I wanted to be with God. And while I have started to climb out of the hole I dug myself into, I don't want to start going through the motions again as I draw nearer to God. I don't want to be 'cozy' in my faith. I've come to realize that I often need to go through an extreme before I change or take action. And so I figure that I really need to be broken by God in order to be able to get all the way out of the hole and start down a new path. As I've said before, get back to basics. Make my faith my own once again. And really just be in constant communion with God, learning to completely rely on Him.

Hm. I say so often that I'm going to do that, but I don't. I know I never truly have. But finally... I am.

After all these years, I'm starting to greatly appreciate what He has done for me. A couple days ago someone told me something along the lines of that I seem to be in sync with God's heart. While I appreciated that, I silently disagreed, even though that's something I desire. But I'm unworthy. I'm a sinner. I'm a hypocrite. I don't deserve any of what I have in God and His Son.

Love.
Grace.
Freedom.
[And so on and so forth, a thousand times over.]

Yet God has chosen me and blessed me.
I'll never understand.

But I'm so thankful for the way God is breaking me and molding me and bringing me to my knees day after day. I am drawing so near to God. I feel that I am closer to Him than I've been in... a good year and a half or so. Four weeks. Oh, how far I've come... The only thing is, I think this is occurring partly because I am purposely distancing myself from other people.

Now, most of this has come from a conversation I had with a peer last night. And she brought up a good point. Doing what I am can be dangerous because the only way you can get to know God is through Christ and His Body. I agree. But I've decided that for now, I truly need this separation. It's done a world of good for me. However, I realize that I will need to restructure a balance of alone time with God, fellowship with others, etc. in the near future. God's Church is truly important and we're meant to act upon the knowledge that we can and should be there for one another - whether we need or want help, encouragement, fellowship... it's great to know that after God, we have brothers and sisters we can turn to.

I feel that God is really opening my eyes to a lot of things - both good and bad - and I'm incredibly grateful for this. God is always good and always near, even though we put up blinders and see only what we want to see, or push God away.

Praise God.
Without ceasing.
Accept His blessings.
Even when you feel worthless and sinful and stupid and hated and unloved.
Reach out to God, because He is constantly reaching out to you.


' "O Sovereign Lord, you have begun to show to your servant your greatness and your strong hand. For what god is there in heaven or on earth who can do the deeds and mighty works you do?" '
[Deuteronomy 3:24]

Ch. 524 - A New Lens

What breaks your heart?

Bad hair days?
Broken nails?

Damsels in distress?
Unrequited love?
Damaged relationships?

Malnourished African babies?
Displaced refugees?
Human-trafficking victims?
Neglected orphans?

Hurt?
Mourning?
Injustice?
Inequality?
Hopelessness?

......

Knowing there are lost people in this world, who don't know the Christ?

......

What breaks God's heart?


'Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.'
[Romans 12:15]

Ch. 523 - One Man

'For just as through the disobedience of the one man the many were made sinners, so also through the obedience of the one man the many will be made righteous.'
[Romans 5:19]

Ch. 522 - Stepping Up and Back

Athlete Blake Haxton once said, "You do what you can, and let God do what you can't."

I realize I may be taking this quote out of context.
That's what Bible college does to you...
... but for now, context-schmontext.
If people are allowed to take Jeremiah 29:11-13 out of context without consequence, I figure I should be allowed to do the same with this quote. So. Even with that realization, I'm going to grab the quote and run with it.

There's only so much we can do... it's true. I've touched on that before, I believe. We aren't superheroes, no matter how hard we try to be.
[Off the record: If I were a superhero, I would want the ability to fly. I realize I probably wouldn't be able to do a whole lot with this, but come on. How cool would that be?!]

Moving forward...
We're not omnipotent.
Ruling.
We're not omniscient.
All-knowing.
We're not omnipresent.
Surrounding.

We're not perfect.

I am of mankind.

Ever since the fall of man, God has charged us with challenges and obstacles. No matter how close I draw to God and want to believe that my life will be smooth sailing, I will most likely always be facing some type of obstacle. But I can do my best to overcome it. God has planned out my life bit by bit. He is the One who places challenges in my life. We are presented with obstacles for a reason.

'But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold.' [Job 23:10]

Author Millie Stamm said, "Courage is firmly facing difficulties and obstacles, knowing God has promised to be with you."

We should consider obstacles as opportunities to give God glory that He wholly deserves. They are as much for His benefit as they are for ours [in the long term of things], if not more.

We can't rely on ourselves to overcome difficult challenges. We must turn to God in all things. Consult Him. Ask for advice. Guidance. Strength. Patience. Whatever you need, request it of God. Step up to His table of abundance with an expectant mindset, and then step back to allow Him room to move before you as He gathers what you've asked for. Let Him work in and through you, accomplishing what you cannot.

Prepare the way.
He'll do what must be done.
Give glory to Him.


'Praise the Lord.

I will extol the Lord with all my
heart
in the council of the upright and in
the assembly.

Great are the works of the Lord;
they are pondered by all who delight
in them.
Glorious and majestic are his deeds,
and his righteousness endures
forever.
He has caused his wonders to be
remembered;
the Lord is gracious and
compassionate.
He provides food for those who fear
him;
he remembers his covenant
forever.
He has shown his people the power of
his works,
giving them the lands of other
nations.
The works of his hands are faithful and just;
all his precepts are trustworthy.
They are steadfast for ever and ever,
done in faithfulness and
uprightness.
He provided redemption for his people;
he ordained his covenant
forever -
holy and awesome is his name.
[Psalm 111:1-9]

Ch. 521 - Encountering God

What does an encounter with God look like to you?

Just something to think about for the week.


'As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!" "Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her." '
[Luke 10:38-42]

Ch. 520 - Silenced

"Hate the sin, not the sinner."

It's got a nice ring, eh?
Overused at times.
But it's a good bit of advice, in my opinion.


' "Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye." '
[Matthew 7:3-5]

Ch. 519 - A Fear of the Future

Eventual complacency on the field.


'Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us.'
[1 Peter 2:12]

Ch. 518 - Investment

READ.

' "Again, it will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servants and entrusted his property to them. To one he gave five talents of money, to another two talents, and to another one talent, each according to his ability. Then he went on his journey. The man who had received the five talents went at once and put his money to work and gained five more. So also, the one with the two talents gained two more. But the man who had received the one talent went off, dug a hole in the ground and hid his master's money.

"After a long time the master of those servants returned and settled accounts with them. The man who had received the five talents brought the other five. 'Master,' he said, 'you entrusted me with five talents. See, I have gained five more.'

"His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!'

"The man with the two talents also came. 'Master,' he said, 'you entrusted me with two talents; see, I have gained two more.'

"His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!'

"Then the man who had received the one talent came. 'Master,' he said, 'I knew that you are a hard man, harvesting where you have not sown and gathering where you have not scattered seed. So I was afraid and went out and hid your talent in the ground. See, here is what belongs to you.'

"His master replied, 'You wicked, lazy servant! So you knew that I harvest where I have not sown and gather where I have not scattered seed? Well then, you should have put my money on deposit with the bankers, so that when I returned I would have received it back with interest.

" 'Take the talent from him and give it to the one who has the ten talents. For everyone who has will be given more, and he will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what he has will be taken from him. And throw that worthless servant outside, into the darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.'" '
[Matthew 25:14-30]

Stop being wasteful.
If God's given you something, use it.
He did so for a reason.
You have a purpose.
Don't be selfish.

Ch. 517 - Shape Up!

'... And Judah is unruly against God, even against the faithful Holy One.'
[Hosea 11:12]

How often are we "unruly" against the HOLY ONE?

Ch. 516 - Enough is Enough

Unity.
"Togetherness."

Why don't we have it?

Three weeks into the school year... and gossip abounds.
Rumors have been started.
Cliques have been formed.
Feelings have been hurt.
Yadda, yadda, yadda.

'High school mode.'
You know?

Why are we tearing each other down?
Why aren't we building one another up?

Encouragement.
Empowerment.
Edification.

Ripple effect.
Positivity VS Negativity.
Now, I know it's tough to choose between the two...
but uh...
something tells me that we should probably try to aim for positivity.
Cool? Cool.


'May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you a spirit of unity among yourselves as you follow Christ Jesus...'
[Romans 15:5]

Ch. 515 - Servanthood as a Privilege

What keeps us from fully wanting to serve our Lord God?

How is it that we become so comfortable so quickly?

Routine.
Schedule.
Familiarity.

Why wouldn't we want to serve our God?

We pray for opportunities, for open doors, only to reject God's answers because it's not what we were expecting... or it's not what we want.

"Beggars can't be choosers."

Especially when God has a specific plan for each of us. He knows what He's doing... He is God, after all. Romans 8:28 says, 'And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.' It may be difficult to see how a situation or what have you may be worked out for good, but it can and will happen. Love God, have faith.

When we have faith in our God, He will do unimaginable things. We will see Him move like never before. One of my professors made a really good point in class today: open doors are not for us [believers]. They're for the people whose hearts have not yet accepted Christ. Open doors allow God to go in and work [through us] on the hearts of those people who are not saved.

Because that's what it's about.

"Why do we become all things to all men?
... To save them."

Become a servant to help save others.

We have to be willing to take the first step.
Yet don't just step, but leap out of your comfort zone!
Readily welcome unfamiliar circumstances.

Have a willing heart.
Do all things cheerfully.
Do all things without complaint.

"We are being trained to open our eyes to all the service opportunities around us."

Don't do something because it is required or "forced" upon you.
Be genuine.
Be real.

Don't just love God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength.
Take the next step.
Serve God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength.

We get to serve God.
We have the freedom to do so.
Think about the old covenant of Biblical times.
Only certain people were allowed to serve God.

'The priests, the sons of Levi, shall step forward, for the Lord your God has chosen them to minister and to pronounce blessings in the name of the Lord and to decide all cases of dispute and assault.'
[Deuteronomy 21:5]

But these days believers, followers of God, are all chosen ministers and servants.

1 Peter 2:9 says, 'But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.'

Die to yourself daily.
Take up your cross.
"Walk the talk."

Ready?
Let's go.
Together.
One Life, one Love.
One Body in and of Christ.


'Then those who feared the Lord talked with each other, and the Lord listened and heard. A scroll of remembrance was written in his presence concerning those who feared the Lord and honored his name. "They will be mine," says the Lord Almighty, "in the day when I make up my treasured possession. I will spare them, just as in compassion a man spares his son who serves him. And you will again see the distinction between the righteous and the wicked, between those who serve God and those who do not." '
[Malachi 3:16-18]

Ch. 514 - What's In a Name?

'Filled with wonder,
awestruck wonder -
at the mention of Your name.
Jesus, Your name is Power
Breath, and Living Water...
such a marvelous mystery.'
[Revelation Song]

I love this song.
Man. Who doesn't?
Anyway.

Whenever I get this song stuck in my head, it usually starts with the verse above.

... That's a really good thing.

I don't believe we realize just how true it is: Jesus' name is Power. Look at everything that's been done in His name.

Prayers have been answered.
The Gospel has been preached.
Demons have been cast out.
People have been healed.
Baptized.
Saved.

The list goes on.... truly.

These things have happened through the power of God.
The only reason our requests are given any consideration is because Christ lives in and through us and is our Mediator to His Father.
When He died for us, He gave up His life. But He continues to live and even reign in us by way of the Holy Spirit, living in our hearts.

2 Corinthians 5:15 says, 'And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again.'

We displace our lives when we accept Jesus the Christ as our Lord and Savior.
Thus, "the same power that conquered the grave lives in me."

So what's in a name?
Well.
When it's the name of Jesus we're talking about... everything!

And yet we continue to take this matter lightly. Think about how many times a day you hear someone say, "Jesus!"... "Jesus Christ!"... "Jesus H. Christ!" ... "Goddamn it!" ... etc.
In the supermarket.
On the television.
At work. At school.

Speaking of school... storytime.
A friend here at Central told me that the other day he heard a new student going up the stairs. The new student said, "J.C.! Why do there have to be so many stairs?!" We may assume that by saying "J.C." he thought he was "safely" saying the Lord's name in vain. My friend, whom the new student didn't know had heard him, reproved his peer and I'm glad he did so.

So moving forward: We use the name of the Lord to exclaim over our difficulties or supposed challenges - I consider this absolutely uncalled for, especially when I think about the fact that Jesus went through and overcame the greatest "challenge" known to mankind. Knowing there is such power in His name, who are we to speak without thinking about it? Our God is a God of absolute might. He can do anything. He deserves our utmost respect. We are to love God, yes, but we are also to fear Him. I think many people tend to think that fearing God is something only people of the Old Testament times had to worry about, but it's not true. There are multiple verses in the New Testament that speak of fearing God - and, at least in my opinion, New Testament verses are certainly more easily to relate to and live life by [than Old Testament verses]. So we should take these verses to heart. One example is 1 Peter 2:17, which says 'Show proper respect to everyone: Love the brotherhood of believers, fear God...'

I simply don't think we should be so comfortable with our Lord God. We can be familiar and intimate with Him, yes... it's just that we forget about His glory too often. We are too comfortable in knowing Him the way we do. I've heard people (usually girls, but a few guys, too) start out prayers with "Hey Dad/dy..." This gets to me more than it probably should. I realize God is our Father and we are His children. And if that's how people connect with Him, then that's great. But we are praying to GOD.
The most high Being.
The Designer of everything known and unknown.
The Creator of life.
The great "I AM."

Don't forget that.


'Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.'
[Philippians 2:9-11]

Ch. 513 - On the Same Page

Alright, so I've been thinking about the concept and act of worshiping God all day, through everything one does. And if you know me at all (or have read my blog somewhat regularly), you'll have come to know that I consider worship a lifestyle. So when I went to check my email before going to bed and the following was one of my devotionals for the day, I was pretty stoked to say the least. Fantastic:

Bringing Pleasure to God

'When I first fell in love with my wife, I thought of her constantly: while eating breakfast, driving to school, attending class, waiting in line at the market, pumping gas—I could not stop thinking about this woman! I often talked to myself about her and thought about all the things I loved about her. I felt close to Kay even though we lived several hundred miles apart and attended different colleges!

Just like my love for Kay transformed everything I did, love for God can transform every activity of our daily lives.

Martin Luther once said, "A dairymaid can milk cows to the glory of God." Does that strike you as a strange thing to say? How can an "un-sacred" chore like milking a cow be an act of worshiping God?

Worship is far more than church services with singing, praying, and listening to a sermon. Worship is anything you do that brings pleasure to God. The Bible says, "The Lord is pleased with those who worship him and trust his love" (Psalm 147:11 CEV).

In the Bible, people praised God at work, at home, in battle, in jail, and even in bed! Anything you do can be an act of worship when you do it for the praise, glory, and pleasure of God.

How is that possible? By doing everything as if you were doing it for Jesus and by carrying on a continual conversation with him while you do it! The Bible says, "So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God" (1 Corinthians 10:31 NIV). And then: "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men" (Colossians 3:23 NIV).

The Message paraphrase says, "Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering" (Romans 12:1).

Worship is not a part of your life, it is your life.'

Ch. 512 - Information Overload

I AM LEARNING.
A lot.

It's pretty overwhelming.

But I like it.
A lot.

I simply feel that God is revealing so much to me right now.
Speaking to me.
Answering prayers.

Those gray areas are dissipating to reveal black and white.
It's been right in front of me the whole time.
I wasn't truly searching.

Praise God for His goodness!


'To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, "If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." '
[John 8:31-32]

Ch. 511 - A Work in Progress

I am slowly, but surely, climbing my way out of the hole I dug myself into over the past few months.

It's certainly a challenging task... but it's been extremely gratifying as I see how much progress I've already made.
And the fact that I have God by my side as I climb up is more than encouraging.


'Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.'
[James 4:8]

Ch. 510 - Digging Deep

2 Peter 3:9.

It's been coming up quite often lately... six different occasions, with no connection between each occasion - within the last three days.

The NASB version says, 'The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance.'

Now, I'm not exactly why this verse keeps coming up, but I'm sure there's a reason. When God will reveal that reason, I don't know. And it really doesn't matter. But for now I'm going to be doing a lot of meditating on His word and looking into the author's intended meaning (putting that Foundations of Christianity vocab to use - astonishing, I know).

Anyway. Things are going really well right now. I don't have a whole lot on my mind.

Ok, that's a lie.

Rather, I should say, I don't have a whole lot on my mind that I feel like writing about or getting out of my head. My thoughts are just fine where they are, for the time being. God is really wonderful, though. I feel like He's doing a lot not just in my life, but many of the lives of the students here at Central - and it's actually evident, for a change. No complaints there, that's for sure. I'm drawing near to God and He is molding me in His beautiful hands. Cleansing. Purifying. Refining.

Oh yes. I am most certainly a fan of this.
I like it.

Speaking of fandom, I'm a pretty big fan of talking about worship and praise lately. It's fantastic. And so I give you the following as a parting verse:


'Worship the Lord in the splendor of
his holiness;
tremble before him, all the earth.'
[Psalm 96:9]

Ch. 509 - Behind the Line

We look and hear… but do we see and listen? We try to understand things to the best of our ability – but we can’t even begin to truly understand without the Spirit. Jesus spoke in parables for a reason. In a sense, I think He was “weeding” people out. If we’re not truly seeking Him or striving to know Him more or learn about Him, it’s like He doesn’t want us. I mean, He does… but as all relationships are, it’s a two-way street. He’s done His part. We have to do ours. But our relationships with God will not amount to anything if we only go about it halfheartedly. He has given us everything. Existence. Truth. His Son. The gift of eternity. LIFE. These things alone are more than enticing, if you will, but nothing’s ever good enough for us. We are a demanding people; we constantly want more, more, more. Yet God doesn’t demand a lot from us. He commands that we love Him, and love others.

“Easier said than done.”
... Is it really?
Or do we want to make it more difficult for ourselves than it truly is?

"God knows how great He is... why does He need me to remind Him?"
Fine. You're right - I mean, He is God...

NO.
That's just being lazy, for goodness' sake.
STOP MAKING EXCUSES!

Where is the line that we find ourselves crossing again and again? And how do we discipline ourselves to stop short of crossing it? Does it merely take time? What do we need to be asking God to teach us?

Self-control... faithfulness... it seems so cliché, but I think we need to continually be asking for and learning the fruits of the Spirit and living our lives by them. Because the more we do so, the nearer to God we will draw, and the more we will stop crossing that line. We will find ourselves wanting an authentic relationship with Christ. We will want to be with God and give Him our all constantly.


'I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better.'
[Ephesians 1:17]

Ch. 508 - Expectant

God hears my whispered prayers amid hundreds of sonorous voices.

How blessed I am to be known by my God.


'O Lord, you have searched me
and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying
down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, O Lord.

You hem me in - behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for
me,
too lofty for me to attain.

Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your
presence?
[Psalm 139:1-7]

Ch. 507 - A Fragrant Offering

Ephesians 5:2 says, '... and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.'

Ephesians 5:1-2 were the daily Bible verses of a site I visit regularly. Now, I believe they're pretty well-known verses. "Be imitators of God." We like to remind ourselves that we should be striving to be Christlike. But actually following through in doing so is an entirely different story... and that story is for another day. So anyway, these were the verses. And just last night I was out on a walk, just clearing my head a bit and talking to God. One thing led to another and soon I began praying about how I am living my life and how I am worshiping my Lord God; I believe worshiping Him is a lifestyle, not a forty-five minute segment on Sundays (and Tuesdays and Fridays, counting chapel here at Central). I started to wonder whether my offering to God, living my life for Him daily and loving Him to the best of my ability, is a fragrant offering... or if it really isn't very pleasing to God. Does He look down at me and smile? Does He hear something I say and frown? Does He cry when I do something wrong? Does He dance when I do something right?

How many times have I turned away from God?
How many times have I said one thing, and then done another?
How many times have I made mistakes and not learned from them?
How many times have I torn down the body of Christ?
How many times have I denied myself partaking in what God has to offer?

How many times have I run back to God?
How many times have I been guided by the Spirit?
How many times have I asked for forgiveness?
How many times have I been encouraged by my brothers and sisters?
How many times have I realized how incredibly loved I am?

I do learn.
I do grow.
I do love people.
I do love my God.

But...

'With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God's likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be.'
[James 3:9-10]

This should not be.

I want things to be completely black and white.
No gray matter, you know?
Yet that's not how it is.

But I don't want my life to be a fragrant offering to God one day...
and a horrid stench the next.

Refine me with fire, Lord God.


'Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise - the fruit of lips that confess his name. And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased.'
[Hebrews 13:15-16]

Ch. 506 - Enlightened to Hope

I have a beautiful hope in Jesus the Christ.

Do you?


'I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe...'
[Ephesians 1:18-19]

Ch. 505 - Light of Day

'The path of the righteous is like the
first gleam of dawn,
shining ever brighter till the full light
of day.'
[Proverbs 4:18]

'... "As surely as the sun rises,
he will appear;
he will come to us like the winter rains,
like the spring rains that water the
earth." '
[Hosea 6:3]

Ch. 504 - An Appointment

I am the daughter of a big God.
And I mean... He is a big, BIG, BIG God.

My God is faithful.
My God is faithful.
My God is faithful.
My God is faithful.

Matthew 21:22. Believe.

I have been waiting.
God has been teaching me patience the past couple years.
[I asked Him to - a request I have not regretted making, even though it's never been an easy lesson to learn.]
But tonight I fully realized how thankful I am for His doing so.
Having patience makes our waiting all the more worthwhile. We more greatly appreciate what we are given after waiting a considerable amount of time for it than if we are given something right after we ask for it.

Prayers have been answered.
PRAISE THE LORD GOD ALMIGHTY, CREATOR OF THE UNIVERSE, PRAYERS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED.

Oh sure, I've had prayers answered in the past. The thing is, those prayers were answered just one at a time. This is different. We're talking a handful of prayers, a few of which I've been lifting up to God for about a year or so - and all were answered in one night! What I love most about the fact that God has answered these prayers is that they are not for my benefit alone. What God does in and through answering these prayers will affect more than one person.

I've never been able to understand the fact that God has chosen to use me as one of His instruments, one of His vessels. Unreal. Simply unreal.

I am honored.

I don't feel worthy of being part of what I believe lies ahead.
Yet here I am. Called.
Standing strong.
Standing tall.
Ready.

This past week has been good, albeit rough around the edges. I think that God has really been renewing me in many ways, getting me ready to truly carry out His will for my life, especially during my time spent at Central. The past few days have been a pretty intense lead up to where I am at this very point in time.

I am willing.
I am ready.

Prepare, prepare!
Change is coming.

Hallelujah, hallelujah!
God's glory will shine.

Let it be so.


'... The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.'
[James 5:16]

Ch. 503 - Stability

I feel like I'm standing in a pool of quicksand.
If I don't move, little to no sinking will occur.
If I try to get out - especially by myself - I will soon end up in great peril.

[Peril may seem a bit much, but it's not very often that you get to use the word peril. It works pretty well with this, so I'm keeping it.]

In all seriousness, though, I need some help to get out of this pit I've suddenly found myself standing in. I don't know what happened, exactly (story of my life). I thought I was making quite a bit of progress. Things were going pretty well. But then I realized that I've really not been myself. I'm happy, yet subdued. I'm drawing nearer to God, yet continue to hold myself an arm's length away.

That's not right.

I have this beautiful idea of the young woman God has created me to be, but I'm nowhere near attaining that idea and making it a reality. I don't like it. But it's true. I have a lot of work to do. Thankfully, I'll be working with my very own Designer and Creator. So I should be pretty good to go.

I just need some stability right now.
Something absolute.
Uplifting.
Encouraging.
Something on and through which I have room to grow.

'On Christ the solid Rock I stand. All other ground is sinking sand.'

This song just started playing in my head.
And how true the lyrics are.
Brilliant.


'The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. I call to the Lord, who is worthy of praise, and I am saved from my enemies. The cords of death entangled me; the torrents of destruction overwhelmed me. The cords of the grave coiled around me; the snares of death confronted me. In my distress I called to the Lord; I cried to my God for help. From his temple he heard my voice; my cry came before him, into his ears.'
[Psalm 18:2-6]

Again. A little dramatic. Not to mention out of context.
... But I like it.

Ch. 502 - The Lion and The Lamb

This morning I was reading in the gym before class; I was reading in the book of Hosea - which is technically irrelevant, but that's where it started for me today. Hosea 11:10 says:

'They will follow the Lord;
he will roar like a lion.
When he roars,
his children will come trembling from the west.'

When I read that the Lord would roar like a lion, I thought, 'Hm. Isn't Christ called the Lion of Judah or something?' I couldn't quite remember, but man, it sure sounded great! So I went with it. I finished reading Hosea and flipped to the book of Revelation. I'm [re]reading it, since I'm in New Testament Prophecy this semester. Last night I had finished reading the letters to the seven churches, so I turned to chapter four, which speaks of the throne of God. Chapter five tells of the scroll and the Lamb, Who is worthy to break the seals and open the scroll. Revelation 5:5 says:

' "Do not weep! See, the Lion of the tribe of Judah, the root of David, has triumphed. He is able to open the scroll and its seven seals." '

Wait, what? The Lion of the tribe of Judah?
Well, well, well.

I'm not going to lie, I felt pretty good after reading that verse. So Christ is, indeed, called the Lion of Judah. Alright, but I have a confession. I've read Revelation quite a few times... also, I figure it's a term I've heard more than once over the years. But if someone had asked, "Hey Natalie - where is Christ referred to as the Lion of Judah?" I honestly couldn't have answered with, "Oh yeah - Lion of Judah... Revelation 5:5, man." Or even if they had asked, "Uhhh, isn't Christ called a Lion of Judah or something?" I don't know if I would have been able to answer with confidence, you know?

Revelation 5:6 goes on to say:

'Then I saw a Lamb, looking as if it had been slain, standing in the center of the throne, encircled by the four living creatures and the elders. He had seven horns and seven eyes, which are the seven spirits of God sent out into all the earth.' "

Strong.
Gentle.
Aggressive.
Meek.
Loud.
Quiet.
Hunter.
Hunted.
Spirited.
Delicate.

I suppose that I simply like the contrast in saying that Christ is a Lion and a Lamb. It really makes Him all the more incredible. The fact that He can be and is each of these things is fascinating to me; He encompasses, if you will, qualities of both and I'm sure that makes Him all the more appealing to certain people in this world. I say this because they may be looking for one thing or another in, for example, a Higher Power that they believe exists, and they will be able to find it in Him.


'Then I heard every creature in heaven and on earth and under the earth and on the sea, and all that is in them, singing:
"To him who sits on the throne and to
the Lamb
be praise and honor and glory and
power,
for ever and ever!" '
[Revelation 5:13]

Ch. 501 - An Oasis

My God is real.
My God is present.

I feel so great right now.
It's not like I'm 100% "better" or anything.
But I'm surely on my way.
I found myself thinking earlier that I felt as if I'd turned right around.
180°.
It's not true, of course, because that wouldn't happen overnight.
And I'm glad.
[What's the destination mean to you without the journey, right?]
Yet even so, the more I thought about it the more I realized it'd really only be something like 110° anyway.
Because I would want to think I did that on my own.
And I would need God to help me turn around completely. I could turn 179.9° and not be able to turn the .1° without God.

God is here.
Right here.
I can call upon Him and He will answer.
He is mighty.
He is at work.
He is glorious.

He watches over us with love and care - and knowing what's best for us.
Not always fun for us when He acts on our behalf, but it's God.
What are you going to do?
Who are you to question His plans, His motives, His actions?

Anyway, I just feel so joyful right now. I just sat down to write this after jumping around my room for something like, half an hour. I'm not kidding. The entire day has been fantastic and it continued right on into the night. I could get used to this. God was just so... I don't know... evident? I don't know how else to put it. But it was great to see and hear Him today on many an occasion.

Forward march.


'Flee the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.'
[2 Timothy 2:22]

Ch. 501 - Passion and Prayer

Passion.
A blessing.
A curse.

I want to do so much with the passions God has placed within me.
But I don't know the first step I need to take, or in what direction I'd take it.

I feel as if I have all this weight pressing on my heart.
And if I don't do something to relieve the pressure, I will go crazy.

I was talking to my mom when I went home the other day. For whatever reason, it was an emotional day. I'm not one to cry often. But then, of course, there are those days where the floodgates open and I can't help myself. I find that usually I'm affected by the people around me when it comes to that kind of thing. So, naturally, because my mom was [I think] more emotional, so was I. Anyway, I was talking about Central and the upcoming year. I talked a lot, and expressed practically every feeling on the spectrum, ranging from sorrow to joy to irritation. It was one of those conversations where I learned a few things as I went along... I didn't really realize what I was saying until after I said it. I was letting my mom know how I felt about some people at school and the leadership and as I sat on a kitchen counter, I burst out with, "I love my school, mom! I love the students!" and started to cry. Out of frustration. Out of happiness. I like that about myself. I have passion for the place where I am and the people I am with at the time being. Someone [whom I've never even met] reminded me that I shouldn't be looking so far to the future to serve God. It's likely that there's a mission and a ministry right where you are. That's more than true for me in the here and now, especially because of where Central is located. Anyway, I simply want so badly to do all I can for my peers. For the school. For the community. See Ch. 398, if you'd like [that's how I'm feeling right now.].

But why are we given passion, desire, and motivation if we don't know what to do with it?
We can tell ourselves to expect God to do great things all we want.
"Praying in faith."
But how do we even begin to pray about letting God incubate our passions within us, letting them develop and grow?

It's simple, I suppose. We just... do.
Pray. And then pray some more.

I mean, why not?
Here's the thing. I love prayer.
But I'm not going to lie - sometimes I find myself wondering what the heck I'm doing. Why would God want to listen to me? Why would He answer my prayers? I'm no one special. Obviously things aren't going to happen if it's not His will, but otherwise it's safe to say that He does, indeed, answer prayer. He sets things in motion for His glory. I just have a hard time believing that He'd want to do anything for us. Man is ugly. There are exceptions. But seriously... we fall. We fall over and over. Yet God continues to be there to catch us and clean up our messes. He even sent His Son to die for us. So when I think about that, I realize that maybe I shouldn't be so frugal and doubtful when it comes to prayer. If laying down your life is the greatest love... it's "been there, done that" for God. I imagine prayer is easy for Him, as the Divine Creator of everything. So really, praying in faith shouldn't be something for me to shy away from. I should be embracing the concept, if anything.

I can't give up on these passions.
I need to be praying for passion, among other things.

God listens.
God gives.
God is good.


' "If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer." '
[Matthew 21:22]

Ch. 500 - A Comforter

Lately I have felt... off. I'm ecstatic to be at school, I love seeing all of my friends, classes have started... I'm happy. But at the same time, I'm not. It's really quite strange and I don't exactly know what my problem is. I've been trying to turn to God for answers and comfort. Sometimes our struggles seem too much to bear. That is, until we bring our troubles to God and asked Him for help. It's hard to do that, but every time you do, it is absolutely worth it.

I often talk to God and pray to Him when I need that help, when I need that comfort. And His word definitely has a comforting quality to it. It brings peace. Assurance. He comforts me when I feel like I have no one to talk to or when I feel like I have no one who understands me. He comforts me when I am simply at a loss. When I don't know what to say. When I don't know what to think. But the mere fact that I know He is always with me helps and I am usually made to feel better. I have thus learned that sometimes it is perfectly fine to be at a loss. God makes up for what we don't have with unconditional love, mercy, and grace. Knowing these things are characteristics of my God is comforting, even. Sometimes I feel like I don't deserve to be comforted. I am a wretched person and don't feel like I am worthy of help or love. I don't even always do my best to comfort people when something is wrong in their lives, so why should someone, even God, want to comfort me? But my goodness, I am always completely grateful for what my God does to make me feel better and uplift me. For me, the smallest bit of encouragement is usually incredibly encouraging.

I really think, however, the fact that I know my God never turns His ear from me is an amazing realization. So whenever I feel that people aren't willing to listen, I can let my voice and thoughts rise to God and know that He not just hears but listens, and understands me entirely. Beautiful.

'You hear, O Lord, the desire of the afflicted; you encourage them and you listen to their cry...'
[Psalm 10:17]

Ch. 499 - For Christ

On my drive home yesterday I had a lot of time to think. One of my predominant thoughts was on suffering. I came to the conclusion that it pains me to say that I have not, in fact, suffered for Christ. That may seem weird. I mean, who wants to suffer, right? But if there's one thing I feel that I deserve, it's exactly that. I am not inherently good. I am broken. I am with fault. I lie. I judge. I envy. I am a sinner. So in my mind, I "deserve" to suffer, in a sense.

Yet even with all of my shortcomings I am loved by my Father and His Son... and I love Them in return. Jesus was crucified on a cross for me. He has suffered more than I ever have by carrying the sins of the world on His shoulders. But what have I done for Christ?

Nothing.

Even out of my extreme love and adoration of Him, I have not brought anything upon myself. Do I really love and adore Him as much as I think I do?

I don't sacrifice anything of myself for Him. And as much as I want to tell others about Christ and just put myself out there for others, I have had little experience in doing so and truly believe that thus, I have yet to suffer in any way, shape, or form. Christianity may be a persecuted religion, but as a member of the body of Christ I have not felt that arm of social injustice as of yet. For all I know I may suffer immensely in the years to come as I give myself to Christ all the more as His servant. But for now, I will remain in my sheltered, ignorant, bubble of bliss here at Central Christian College of the Bible in Moberly, Missouri. I will sit and do my homework and fulfill my required service hours like the good Christian student that I am. Complacent and comfortable, compliant and complaisant.

... Right?

WRONG.

If I don't start becoming bold in my faith, speaking out in Christ's name, or giving glory to God for all things said and done right here and right now, then when will I?
In a week?
A month?
A year?
Five, ten years?

Unacceptable.

Christ suffered for more than one reason.
But those reasons do not include 'so that Natalie can just chill at Bible college while learning to be an "authentic kingdom leader" but not apply herself while not on the field'.

Christ could come back tomorrow. He could come back in eleven minutes.

But what will I have done for His Kingdom?
Will He say to me, "Well done, good and faithful servant!"?
Or will He say instead, "I don't know you or where you come from. Away from me."?

I know which one I want to hear.
And if I get to suffer for Jesus Christ while serving His Father, then the Lord God will let it be so. I simply cannot be complacent and expect great things to happen in and by His name. I need to be willing to take chances. Risks. Be a rebel for Christ (cliché, I know).

God is good.
He offers us true life.
Living water.
What do we offer Him?
Our praises?
Our service?
Our own lives?

Or do we cast aside the thought that He deserves everything and more?

Today I was making cookies for some people. At one point I burnt my thumb while taking out a tray. I thought to myself, "Man. These cookies better be appreciated."

Do you think that as Christ hung on the cross He was thinking, "Man. All mankind better appreciate my doing this."?

...... Just a thought.


'If we are out of our mind, it is for the sake of God; if we are in our right mind, it is for you. For Christ's love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died.'
[2 Corinthians 5:13-14]

Ch. 498 - A Desire and Truth

'The fear of the Lord is the beginning of
wisdom;
all who follow his precepts have
good understanding.
To him belongs eternal praise.'
[Psalm 111:10]

Ch. 497 - A Little Goes a Long Way

I really like genuine people.


'Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves.'
[Romans 12:9-10]

Ch. 496 - Holy Living

'Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of the God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.'
[Colossians 3:1-2]

As I was reading through Colossians this evening, these verses really spoke to me. I think that because the school year has finally begun [ok, well, basically begun] that my focus has quickly shifted. This summer I was not setting my heart and mind on things above. I should have. I needed to. But I didn't. It's as simple as that. As I've said before, I just didn't care. Yet now that I'm back at school, it's 'time' to turn back to God and be a good girl who reads her Bible... a girl who is 'joyful always, prays continually, and gives thanks in all circumstances'... a girl who 'does not let any unwholesome talk come out of her mouth'... a girl living for God, and only God. Easier said than done. But that's what it's about. Trials. Joys. Working at it. The journey. The relationship. The foundation. But I can't live a cyclical life. I can't go back and forth. Die daily. Live for Him. Be forgiven. Be loved. Always.

My heart and mind really do need to be set on Christ continually. If I want growth, God will plant the seeds when my motives and desires are true and based on His will for me. It's time to raise the bar for setting expectations of myself. Because I think I've reached a point where my expectations are simply not high enough. They're too easy to reach.

It's a new year.
And with the new year comes new goals.
New experiences.
New hurts.
New dreams.
New prayers.
New tribulations.
New hopes.
New challenges.
New deceptions.
New friends.
New encouragement.
New gossip.
New thoughts.
New calls.
New life, it seems.

And I thank God for this, because a renewal is taking place. God is cleansing my heart and I feel that His doing so will better enable me to take up my cross daily and more readily do what Colossians 3:1-2 says to do.

What a beautiful God I have and know.

Ch. 495 - Something to Seek

God brings people together for many reasons. And while we may not always know what those reasons are at the time of meeting, the fact that there is, in fact, a reason, makes time spent with other people all the more special. I think - no, I know - we take time for granted. For certain, I am incredibly guilty of doing so. But do I then attempt to make the most out of the time I am given by God every day? ... No. I even go so far as to complain that there aren't enough hours in a day, yet I am never as productive as I could be. I just feel so backwards, sometimes. And usually I don't try to turn myself around until I am given a push in the right direction. Going back to my original thought, though: we need to make the most of our time - especially considering the fact that our life here on earth is so incredibly short.

Nate Sallie sings, "Heaven's just a breath away, and I can't waste another day pretending that tomorrow's a guarantee; I've got to face my reality," in his song 'Heaven's Just a Breath Away'. How true these lyrics are.

Anyway, I simply love the fact that my God knows me so well and wants the best for me. He delivers joy, laughter, and cheer through other people and it makes me think about how personal and small my God is. But then I am always awestruck when I realize that He's holding not only my life in His hands, but the lives of everyone around me, as well - and I think about how caring and big my God is.

I know I'm kind of jumping around from here to there, but I have a lot on my mind right now. So really, these are my thoughts going straight down through my fingers into the computer. Recently I've been thinking more about what I'm writing, unlike in the past, but not today - that's for sure.

Joy.
Help.
Beauty.
Seeking and grasping all the more.


'One thing I ask of the Lord,
this is what I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the
Lord
all the days of my life,
to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord
and to seek him in his temple.
For in the day of trouble
he will keep me safe in his dwelling;
he will hide me in the shelter of his tabernacle
and set me high upon a rock.'
[Psalm 27:4-5]

Ch. 494 - The Second Start

I am typing this from my room at Central Christian College of the Bible. It's the start of my second year at Central and I could not be happier to be back at school! I - along with many others I've talked to recently - are so positive that it's going to be a fantastic year. I'm really excited to see how God moves and changes the hearts of people throughout their time at Central. There's so much to learn, too! It never ceases to amaze me how big and awesome our God is. We'll never know everything, and I can't even begin to imagine how much there is to know, anyway. But it's fun to attempt to do so, in a sense. Anyway, I'm simply ecstatic to be back and get started on Thursday. My classes for the semester are as follows:

SALT: Motivation
Survey of Literature
New Testament Prophecy [Revelation]
Israel After the Exile
World Religions and Cultures
Foundations of World Missions
Cross-Cultural Communication
Interpersonal Communication

22 credit hours, service hours for SALT, Harvesters, devotions, random going-ons here and there, going home now and then... ETC., ETC., ETC. I'll be kept busy this semester, that's for sure. At least I'm really looking forward to it all. And it helps that I truly love school and learning. I enjoy studying, I enjoy doing my assignments.

It's going to be a good year.
I can't wait to see what God does.
Fantastic.


' "God is exalted in his power.
Who is a teacher like him?
Who has prescribed his ways for him,
Or said to him, 'You have donw
wrong'?
Remember to extol his work,
which men have praised in song.
All mankind has seen it;
men gaze on from afar.
How great is our God - beyond our
understanding!
the number of his years is past
finding out." '
[Job 36:22-26]

Ch. 493 - A Gift of Peace

So lately I've been thinking a lot about peace. And I mean a lot. I'm not talking about 'being at peace' in regards to not being at war... And while I don’t really want to go with the stereotypical aspects of what peace is or is not. Yet I feel I may have to. I mean, again - at its simplest form, peace is the absence of conflict. But it’s so much more than that. There are two types of peace, in my opinion. First, there’s having that external peace within the world around you... a quiet serenity, perhaps. Then there’s the internal peace that only you know about. It’s an inner calm that nobody but God can give you. Thus said, I think being at peace internally is certainly a gift. Hopefully that makes sense. I believe having that sense of peace – especially within yourself – is important. There’s so much turmoil and conflict in the world that we could use all the peace we can possibly get! In all seriousness, though, there truly is nothing like feeling you have received that inner peace from your God. I think people don't always realize how nice it is to have that peace...

Peace is knowing that you are loved.
Cherished.
Peace is knowing that you are safe.
Forgiven.
Peace is knowing that you are significant in an insignificant world.
Worthwhile.

I feel these are the gifts God is giving me at this point in time.
And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Because here's the thing. Any peace is better than no peace, first of all. And coming from our Most High Lord God, how could you say what He gives is not good enough for you? He knows exactly what we need, when we need it. So while I may not fully understand what He's doing with me, it's okay. Because I know what He does is good. I also may not feel like I'm filled to the brim with peace, but I do feel that I have enough to be able to seek and grasp that joy that I've been seeking for what seems like a lifetime. I think the main thing is that I feel like God is giving me the go-ahead. I can proceed, you know? I'm not taking one step forward and ten steps back anymore. It's one step forward, one step forward, one step forward. Man oh man, those steps are small. But I'm moving. And I'm not looking back. I'm thankful for what God is giving me in the here and now. He is more than praiseworthy. He deserves the best from us. Praise Him.


'Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times and in every way. The Lord be with all of you.'
[2 Thessalonians 3:16]

Ch. 492 - What Christ "Did"

Last semester I was asked a question for a journal prompt: 'What did Christ do for you?' The best I could come up was saying something along the lines of "What didn't He do for me?' And even though I've honestly been thinking about this topic for quite some time now, it's as if my mind freezes up and I don't know what to say. I want something easy to be good enough, but it shouldn't be. I could go even further on taking the easy route and give the simplistic, Sunday school answer: everything. God did so much for mankind by giving us His Son. Not only did Christ provide the perfect example of what our lives should looks like, but through His death and resurrection He gave us life - true life. I really could go on and on about 'what Christ did' for me, but I'm pretty sure I don't have enough words in me to do so. Not to mention my life on this earth is finite and could end any moment. However, I will say this: Because Christ conquered the grave, I am not held down. I am free. I will have eternal life with Christ because I am not bound to hell by the chains of sin. Praise God for His grace, mercy, and love! There is so much to praise and thank God for because of what His Son did for us. It truly is incomprehensible. We will never be able to fully understand why God loves us so much... neither will we ever fully understand what He saved us from. I honestly don't think that I ever want to know, but the fact that He did indeed save us from darkness and death is mind-blowing. I don't even know what else to say. There's so much to say, but I just don't know how to say it. I think I'm going to have to leave it at that. God is good. Christ is good. All the time.


' "For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many." '
[Mark 10:45]

Ch. 491 - Margin

So I was cleaning out my inbox today and was going through some old devotionals. I found this one and, seeing how I start classes on Thursday, thought it pretty appropriate. I've promised myself that I'm going to procrastinate less this term and get the amount of sleep I need each night to function properly (eight hours - no more, no less). I don't want to get to feeling so overloaded that I just start going through the motions and don't put enough time in for what's truly important: spending time with my God.

'A lot of people are on overload and headed for a crash. Consider these statistics among U.S. citizens:
- People now sleep 2 1/2 fewer hours each night compared to people from one hundred years ago.
- The average work week is longer now than it was in the 1960s.
- The average office worker has 36 hours of work piled up on his or her desk. It takes three hours a week just to sort through it and find what we need.
- We spend eight months of our lives opening junk mail, two years of our lives playing phone tag with people who are too busy to answer, and five years waiting for people who are trying to do too much and are late for meetings.

We're a piled-on, stretched-to-the limit society; chronically rushed, chronically late, chronically exhausted. Many of us feel like Job did when he said, "I have no peace! I have no quiet! I have no rest! And trouble keeps coming" (Job 3:26, GWT). Overload comes when we have too much activity in our lives, too much change, too many choices, too much work, too much debt, too much media exposure.

Dr. Richard Swenson says, "The conditions of modern day living devour margin. If you're homeless we direct you to a shelter. If you're penniless we offer you food stamps. If you're breathless we connect you to oxygen. But if you're marginless we give you one more thing to do. Marginless is being thirty minutes late to the doctor's office because you were twenty minutes late getting out of the hairdresser because you were ten minutes late dropping the children off at school because the car ran out of gas two blocks from a gas station and you forgot your purse. That's marginless."

You need margin in your life. When you're not hurrying and worrying all the time, you have time to think. Time to relax. Time to enjoy life. Time to be still and know that God is God (Psalm 46:10).'

Ch. 490 - Utopia

'In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth.'
[Genesis 1:1]

'For by him all things were created; things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him.'
[Colossians 1:16]

The world was created by and for God, and God was for the world. God is for the world. This place that God created was, in a sense, ideal. There was no evil to be known. There was no violence. There was no terror. There was no war. The world that God created was peaceful, serene, and lush with life. Simply put, the world was beautiful. God created man for interpersonal relationship. God knew man, and man was to know God. Man, however, had to... mess up. Granted, it was all part of God's plan, but why? I mean, the world was perfect... But since the fall of man, mankind has been immersed in sin. Mankind is also surrounded by hatred. There have been crises, uprisings, downfalls, and death. It seems as if there has been little harmony in the world since its creation. However, there have been people who have focused on - even obsessed over - the idea of creating and living in a once-again ideal, harmonic world... one much like the world that God first created for man. For you. For me. But throughout this seemingly subtle pursuit of heaven on earth, or paradise, more trouble has been caused than anything. "Free will" and laws [designed by man] are out of sync with God's intended way of life, and thus create anarchy, disorder, and societal disasters. Even so, many continue to live in hope that the world can be changed and turned back into the world that God first created: a place of proportion, peace, and perfection. This place, called by many Utopia, may or may not ever exist. I wonder how far man would go in attempt to create and attain this so-called paradise on earth. Probably pretty far... the thing is, it can't be done without Christ in the picture. This is something we should be thankful for. If it weren't the case, there's no telling what Utopia would look like - or what the world will end up looking like before Christ comes again.