Ch. 236 - Magnificent Memorization

This week's memory verse:

'Your word I have treasured in my heart, so that I may not sin against You.'
[Psalm 119:11, NASB]

Ch. 235 - No Other Name

' "Salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given to men by which we must be saved." '
[Acts 4:12]

It is through Jesus alone that we are saved.

Ch. 234 - One Another

‘Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful; and let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds, not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near.’
[Hebrews 10:23-25, NASB]

Community.
Beautiful.

Ch. 233 - I Like Rollercoasters

As the title implies, I like rollercoasters. I love going up and down and around and backwards and upside down and side to side and fast. But when you use the analogy of a rollercoaster to describe how you're doing emotionally or spiritually, I don't like rollercoasters too much. And unfortunately, that's exactly where I am with quite a few things at this point in time. Life is speeding up again and taking unexpected twists and turns - both big and small. I don't know why. I know there's a reason that I simply haven't found yet; God has had this all planned out for some reason or another and I know that in time He will reveal what that reason is.


'Many are the woes of the wicked, but the Lord's unfailing love surrounds the man who trusts in him.'
[Psalm 32:10]

Ch. 232 - Appreciation of Prayer

I'm pretty ecstatic about the fact that God answers prayer. And that through prayer great things can happen - not just for ourselves, but for others. I honestly don't know what else to say. Pray. And don't stop doing so, ever. Worship God with your prayer.


'This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us - whatever we ask - we know that we have what we asked of him.'
[1 John 5:14-15]

Ch. 231 - With Humility

'When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.'
[Proverbs 11:2]

Wisdom.
Goodness gracious.
I could go on and on about this. Not because I have wisdom, but because it is something I desire. Perhaps one day I'll be able to expound on wisdom that God has bestowed upon me...

Ch. 230 - Different but United

Today I went to another Christian church [Rocky Fork Fellowship]. One of my friends' dad is the pastor there. It's always interesting to see how things are done at each church. This particular congregation actually meets in the cafeteria of an elementary school, that was pretty different. But it doesn't matter where you worship, so long as you are truly giving God the praise He deserves.

I was going to continue on with the differences among churches and such, but I'm really tired. I've already had a long day and it's not even 5:00. Man oh man. Perhaps I'll pick up where I left off in a day or two... or three or four...

'Here there is no Greek or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and is in all... Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.'
[Colossians 3:11,15]

Ch. 229 - Grateful

When I feel like I have nowhere to turn... nobody to lean on... God provides. He gives me a path. He gives me a shoulder. And I am more grateful for this than you can imagine. He reminds me that He is with me. He created me. He loves me. I needed those reminders today and I received them through a great friend.

God is good.
All the time.


'A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.'
[Proverb 17:17]

Ch. 228 - Hurt

Sometimes my heart hurts.
Sometimes my heart hurts a lot.
No, it's not heartburn.
No, it's not been broken.
It simply hurts.
It pounds in true, physical pain.
When I think of how many people don't know Jesus.
When I think of how many people are living in sin and don't repent.
When I think of how ridiculous I am and how amazing God is.

I don't know how to handle it.
But God does. And through prayer, reflection, more prayer, and His love and grace, I am healed. I have a better understanding of why it hurts. Why I have been put in this place that I call home, His world, created by Him for us. And then my heart doesn't hurt nearly so bad.
Thank You, Lord.


'He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. He determines the number of the stars and calls them each by name. Great is our Lord and mighty in power; his understanding has no limit.'
[Psalm 147:3-5]

Ch. 227 - Go

This week's memory verse:

' "Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age." '
[Matthew 28:19-20, NASB]

Ch. 226 - To This Day

'My mouth will tell of your righteousness, of your salvation all day long, though I know not its measure. I will come and proclaim your mighty acts, O Sovereign Lord; I will proclaim your righteousness, yours alone. Since my youth, O God, you have taught me, and to this day I declare your marvelous deeds.'
[Psalm 71:15-17]

7. September 2010 Edit:

This is a psalm of supplication and praise. I've actually been thinking lately about how it is easy for us to bless God with our praise and worship after He has done something in our favor, answered our prayers, etc. But really, we should be swift to praise Him before and throughout our time of supplication. It should be continuous. Imagine a life lived doing exactly what the above verses state.

Telling of His righteousness.
Proclaiming His mighty acts.
Declaring His marvelous deeds.

What a testament to the belief that our Lord God is sovereign.

Ch. 225 - Working At It

I'm really getting back into prayer. I was good about it up to about the end of September, when one day I just sort of stopped caring. Terrible.

But since I've truly devoted myself to spending more time with God, praying to and talking with Him, things have been so much better for me. I am so blessed.


'Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.'
[Colossians 4:2]

Ch. 224 - He Knows Us

I'm realizing all the more that the way I think, speak and act depends on the people I'm around. And I don't like that. Not one bit. I should, by now, be able to be my own person. I feel pathetic. I mean, I could go ahead and say that I'm still trying to figure out just exactly who I am... but I don't believe that we will ever fully know ourselves. The only person who truly comprehends and knows all of me is God.

And I'm glad.

I look at it as if it's a game. A puzzle, really. You have to use many small pieces to put together a large picture. You try out different pieces here and there. Sometimes the first piece you try to put into place simply fits. Other times, pieces look like they fit, but in reality they don't - so over time you make an adjustment, putting the pieces that truly fit into their rightful places. Putting a puzzle together can be really relaxing. However, putting a puzzle together can also be very frustrating.

I like to think that as I am working on my puzzle, God cheers for me when I place the pieces correctly. Especially when I see that one piece doesn't actually go in a particular spot - it's merely an impostor. A thing to fill a void.

I am so lucky to have a God that fills all empty space. To have a God who knows me inside and out. To have a God who loves me unconditionally, no matter where I am in my walk.


'The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love. By this the love of God was manifested in us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world so that we might live through Him.'
[1 John 4:8-9]

Ch. 223 - Carneeelian

'At once I was in the Spirit, and there before me was a throne in heaven with someone sitting on it. And the one who sat there had the appearance of jasper and carnelian.'
[Revelation 4:2-3]

Carnelian is a 'hard red chalcedony used in jewelry'.
Chalcedony is 'a translucent variety of quartz of various colors and waxy luster'.

You learn something new every day.

Not even kidding, this is my post for the day.

Ch. 222 - The Reflection

I am good. ... No.
I am great. Ehh... not quite.
I am awesome. Almost!
I am incredible. Still not there.

Honestly, words cannot express how I am right now. How I feel. How I think. Life is simply really great for me. I have a lot to be thankful for, that is an absolute given. One thing I'm thankful for is the fact that I am truly becoming closer with God. And that is most important to me, so I am simply all the more grateful.

I've been praying for this - to be where I am currently - for a very long time. Slowly but surely... God is answering my prayer.

Everything seems to be coming together, you know? Things just work. They match up. Click. Come together.

I couldn't be happier. Well. I mean, I'm sure I could be, but for now I am amazingly content. That doesn't mean I'm going to settle, but I'm pretty good to go for the time being. My God is so great. The more I think just that... the more I see how true it is. I don't deserve this - whatever 'this' may be. Seriously, I simply can't wrap my mind around the fact that a God as great as He wants anything to do with me. I'm appreciative, but practically in disbelief.


'... in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.'
[Romans 8:37-39]

Ch. 221 - The Faithful Witness

' "I am the Alpha and the Omega," says the Lord God, "who is, and who was, and who is to come, the Almighty." '
[Revelation 1:8]

6. September 2010 Edit:

I find great comfort knowing that an Almighty God is in control of all things, including my life. Puppetmaster? Not so much... I like to think of my Lord God as a symphonic composer. I feel that basically speaks for itself... but really, I simply cannot decide where to go with this. There are so many things one could say in expounding upon this verse. Which is good. Our Lord God is not a shallow god. He is a God of depth and mystery, of light and truth. He is everlasting. Creator. Ruler. And it goes on...

Ch. 220 - How Beautiful

My God is beautiful.
Everything He has made is beautiful.
And that includes you.

That's all I have to say.


'He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end.'
[Ecclesiastes 3:11]

Ch. 219 - I Am Hungry

I'm not going to lie: throughout fall break, I couldn't wait to get back to Central. Don't get me wrong, I love my family and I really enjoyed being home for a few days. But I wanted to dive back into classes and assignments and - dare I say - papers, quizzes and even tests. Go ahead and say it - I do every day: I'm a freak.

I suppose that's one way you could know you're in the right place and that you're doing something you love and what God wants you to be doing for now...

I am hungry for God right now. That's a good thing to be hungry for, if I may say so myself.
All I want to do is talk to Him and learn about Him and serve Him. I think the fact that I often do these things through my schooling is pretty neat.

I'm doing really well right now. Really well. And I thank God for this, because without Him I wouldn't be able to say that I'm doing really well.


'And he passed in front of Moses, proclaiming, "The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin..." '
[Exodus 34:6-7]

Ch. 218 - Hold My Heart

'How long must I pray, must I pray to You?
How long must I wait, must I wait for You?
How long 'til I see Your face, see You shining through?
I'm on my knees, begging You to notice me.
I'm on my knees, Father will you turn to me?'
[Tenth Avenue North's Hold My Heart]

Today I logged onto my chat messenger and saw that a friend had left me a message that said 'Check out "Hold My Heart" by Tenth Avenue North.' I was like, 'Alright, why not?' So I did. As I listened to this song, tears started to stream down my face. The lyrics expressed exactly what I've been thinking and praying for the past... goodness... six, seven months? That's it, seven months. God definitely used this song to speak to me. It's like He was saying, "Hey, it's okay. I'm right here, and I hear you. I'm not going anywhere." Really great. But I also felt He was saying, "Turn to me and I shall turn to you. Notice me, and I shall notice you." I needed that. It was kind of a wake-up call, in a sense. God is good.


'He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me.'
[Psalm 18:19]

Ch. 217 - A Thorough How-To

Sometimes I just wish that there was a step-by-step guide... manual... map... to my life. I could see where I'm supposed to be going, who I'm supposed to be interacting with, what I'm supposed to think, say and do. I could see how to live my entire life. Wouldn't that be grand?

I have no clue what I'm going to do. I go back and forth, back and forth between options. I can't just not have a plan anymore. I need a goal. An objective. A dream or two, at the very least - and I do. I even spoke of said dreams in a previous post. But I feel like that's not good enough.

And I want more than a gentle nudge in one direction or a faint whisper in my ear. God obviously doesn't understand that I don't operate that way. Oh, wait... He's the one who created me. Oops. I guess He does... hmph. You fooled me, God, that's for sure.

I'm still learning patience. Every time I think I've got it under my belt, I am proven wrong. Not that there's anything wrong with that. If patience is such a virtue (a 'particular moral excellence'), as the saying goes, I suppose there's no way that we can ever have it down pat after a year or two. That would be too easy.

But God knows what He's doing. And that is a comforting thought.


'May the Lord direct your hearts into God's love and Christ's perseverance.'
[2 Thessalonians 3:5]

Ch. 216 - 'Why Am I Crying?'

'You who were as numerous as the stars in the sky will be left but few in number, because you did not obey the Lord your God.'
[Deuteronomy 28:62]

3. September 2010 Edit:

'Why am I crying?' I clearly remember thinking this. I had been reading through Deuteronomy for my Pentateuch class and when I came to this verse, I began to cry. For whatever reason, it simply struck me... and I was saddened to read that God allowed such a thing to happen to the Israelites. But... it's in the past, so why should it matter to me? Should I really care? I mean, it doesn't really affect me, right? It's an entirely irrelevant verse and issue! I disagree. I think that this verse is important. It serves to remind us that our Lord God is entirely in control and He holds our lives in His hands. We do need to be obedient to God, continually. His chosen people, Israel, were "left but few in number", because of their disobedience... I think that it's safe to say that bad things can possibly happen to those who do not obey our Lord God. Not that He has it out for the disobedient - but He will certainly not hesitate, I believe, to let it be known that redirection is in order.

Ch. 215 - Skipping Around

I am not the same person here.

It's incredible how being around different people in a different place with a different atmosphere can affect you and the way you act and the way you speak.

... That sentence was ridiculous.

It's not that I'm not walking the talk any less here at home (I'm on fall break, by the way) than I do at school. But my focus/mindset/whatever doesn't seem to revolve around Him. I may be on break - but from school, not God. So I need to work on that.

I'm continuously working on slowing down, though. I truly think I'm getting better about doing so. I believe it's even easier to do so here at home because there are less distractions. I'm finding the joy and seeing the beauty in all things and people more and more, it seems.

I like that.
A lot.
I think it pleases God.

Is that too bold or prideful to say?


'And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ - to the glory and praise of God.'
[Philippians 1:9-11]

Ch. 214 - Man of Sorrows

'He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering. Like one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not. Surely he took up our infirmities, and carried our sorrows, yet we considered him stricken by God, smitted by him, and afflicted. But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed.'
[Isaiah 53:3-5]

26. August 2010 Edit:

Our Savior knows of everything that we could experience.
He knows joy.
He knows anger.
He knows frustration.
He knows love.
He knows opportunity.
He knows doubt.
He knows suffering.
Yet He knew no sin, dying for us.
And that is how we are able to know His Father.

Ch. 213 - A Mighty Power

Sometimes you need a breakdown before you can get anywhere.
I've been there.
"It's always darkest before dawn."

I don't mind being broken.
I think it's necessary to grow, at times.
I want to be humbled.
I want to cry out to God.
I want to serve.
I want to be taught.

I can't do everything on my own. Anything, really. God makes all things possible. I am breathing because of Him. I am thinking because of Him. I am singing praises to Him because of Him.

I am because of Him.

I forget that too often.


'The Spirit of God has made me; the breath of the Almighty gives me life.'
[Job 33:4]

......

Ch. 213, Part Two:

This week's memory verse:

'For you were called to freedom, brethren; only do not turn your freedom into an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.'
[Galatians 5:13]

Ch. 212 - We the People

A lot of people have been on my heart lately. People here. People from Iowa. People in Utah. It's like I can't stop thinking about them. I'm not one to worry a lot, but for some reason I am doing just that. And it's disconcerting to a small extent.

As I think about and pray for these people, I find myself contemplating their walks with God and imagining what He has in store for them. I think it's fascinating to think about what He can do with people. Think about the patriarchs of faith... the pagan worshipers who turned their lives over to God... people like Rahab. It blows my mind to see how He has used people over the years for the furthering of His kingdom. To reveal His glory through us. I still have a difficult time believing that He'd want to ever use me. Be with me. Love me.

But that's where faith comes in. I have to believe that He really does want me. That he really does love me. Because without that everyday belief, I am nothing. I would have no reason to be. And that's why I have faith.

Everyone that God has placed on my heart recently has shown me pieces of their faith in some way over the time I've known them. I have learned from each person. I have grown because of them. I am incredibly grateful for each individual and I praise God for creating them and putting them in my life.


'Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.'
[Ecclesiastes 4:9-12]

Ch. 211 - An Encouraging Day

I didn't get any sleep last night. I was busy not studying for LOC and writing papers for Foundations. Not bad, really. But I really was very tired. I started the day at a low, went up to a nice high where I thought everything was funny, then crashed back down to another low. I'm not going to lie, I definitely had a difficult time staying awake in my classes. I did the best I could, scout's honor! I am never pulling an all-nighter ever again...

... that's a lie.

Even though I knew what the day was going to be like, I knew that God would help me make the most out of it. I took each step with a smile and looked forward to what every new hour would bring. Talking - er, more like listening - about joy in Discipleship was great (yeah, shoutout to Mr. Worstell), seeing how I'm sort of on a joy kick right now.

I just love it here.
I love my classes.
I love simple, ol' Moberly.
I love my friends.

I know who to turn to when I'm feeling upset.
I know who to turn to when I need a hug (or don't, but want one anyway).
I know who to turn to when I've got a story to tell.
I know who to turn to when I want some advice.

I've got a new family here at Central and I'm excited. God is going to work through us all in amazing ways and I can't wait to see what He has in store for these beautiful people I'm coming to know and love dearly.

Ch. 210 - Born of God

'Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God - children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband's will, but born of God.'
[John 1:12-13]

25. August 2010 Edit:

I am a child of God.
A beloved daughter.

I love my parents. A lot. And I know they love me. A lot. So it truly fascinates me to think of how greatly my Lord God loves me. Because I know that His love surpasses my parents' love to an entirely incomprehensible degree. I also think it is interesting that it is our right to become children of God. It is not a privilege, which can be taken away. It is not a reward that we must earn by doing something worthwhile or good. God loves us that much. I have nothing else to say. I am simply that awestruck.

Ch. 209 - Questions

As I'm working on opening my Bible more and more, I'm realizing that a lot of questions are coming up. I'm not going to list them out or anything, I just thought I'd bring it up for now. Maybe dive into one of these questions here or there. It's just that I've never really had a lot of questions come up as I've read. I've gone through chapters and books like it's nobody's business, but not given it a whole lot of thought. I mean, I could go through the entire Bible, word for word, in a week if I wanted to. I'd comprehend what I'm reading really well, but at the same time probably not get a whole lot out of it, you know? But now I'm really wanting to completely understand the word of God and use it as a guide and resource, not just as a book to read for Bible study or to be a good little Christian.

So here we go...


'For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.'
[Hebrews 4:12]

Ch. 208 - With the Spirit

I read Galatians during breakfast this morning. I really like the book of Galatians, especially chapters three, five and six. In fact, for my exegesis in Foundations of Christianity I went with the Galatians 6:7-10 option. Anyway, something I read really stuck out to me.

'But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.'
[Galatians 5:22-26]

'Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.'
[v. 25]

This was what stuck out to me the most.

I am saved. The Holy Spirit lives in my heart. But I seem to forget that a lot. Am I truly living a Spirit-filled life? A life that is pleasing to God? Paul goes on to list the fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Are these fruits the main portions of my diet? I'd like to think they are... but I know that they are not.

If I want to go out and teach others others in this world to live by and with the Spirit, I have to be doing so first. And if I want others to completely be partaking in the fruits of the Spirit, again - I have to be doing so first. I can't expect to be and see a positive change for God's kingdom in this world if I'm not even fully living for and with Him. Trust me when I say that was really difficult to realize and say, but it's certainly the truth and it's about time that I do something about it. I have to learn to lean on Him and trust in the Spirit before I can truly walk with Him.


'You are all sons of God through faith in Christ Jesus, for all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ.'
[Galatians 3:26-27]

Ch. 207 - Mindset

I've realized that the more I believe the day is going to be good, it is.
The more I don't look forward to it or don't consciously believe it is going to be good, it isn't.

For, believe it or not, the first time in my life, I prayed on mornings this week to God that I would just be with Him and see and feel Him everywhere. That I would be able to grasp His joy and make it my own. I committed my life to him over and over again each day. I laid everything down. I gave Him my burdens. I kept thinking to myself, 'It's going to be a great day. I can't wait to see what happens. God is with me, God is with me.'

I hadn't had such good days since I've been here at Central. I'm not going to lie. And finally, I'm beginning to feel a change for the positive. I'm taking baby steps, but I'm walking towards God and I can't wait to be in His arms once again. I'm also opening His word more and I think that's making a big difference. I knew it would, but didn't really care until I hit that low. These things happen for a reason, that's for sure. Indeed, I now know what it's like to be where I was and I never want to be there again. I know what I have to do to stay away. To stay close to God. Everything we go through is a learning experience. God truly is our greatest Teacher.


'The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them.'
[Psalm 145:18-19]

Ch. 206 - A Two-Way Street

This week's memory verse:

'Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded.'
[James 4:8, NASB]

24. August 2010 Edit:

I personally believe that this is one of those "live-by" verses. Draw near to God. Cleanse... purify... It's good. It's simply good. And I think that by doing these things we will be benefited in a multitude of ways. I think that God desires to bless His children. But if we aren't close with Him, if we aren't striving to be more like His Son, then who are we to assume that He will bestow upon us anything and everything that we desire or even need? It is important that we humble ourselves before our Lord God and ask Him to help us be the people He created us to be. Repent. Confess. Live in and by Him. And He will, indeed, draw near.

Ch. 205 - Living With Joy

I needed today to be a good day.

And it was.

God was with me today.
Don't bother saying or thinking, 'He always is!'

I know.
I know, I know, I know.

But I'm going to say it again:

God was with me today.

I'm slowing down.
I'm finding the joy.
I'm seeking HIM.
I'm living peacefully.

It's about time.


'Many are asking, "Who can show us any good?" Let the light of your face shine upon us, O Lord. You have filled my heart with greater joy than when their grain and new wine abound. I will lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety.'
[Psalm 4:6-8]